Author: Keira Marcos
Challenge: Inevitable (McSheplets LJ)
Rating: R (for language/adult themes)
Spoilers: Trinity, The Shrine, The Lost Tribe, The Outsiders (all very subtle)
Word Count: 1,014
Summary: “Are you saying that my performance as the military half of our intergalactic ass-kicking duo is subpar?” John demanded.
Status: Completed (and not series related)
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Don’t pretend to. If I did own them, they would have a happily dysfunctional relationship with each other instead of inflicting themselves on others like the weapons of mass emotional destruction they are. Just sayin’.
* * * *
It’s stupid really. So fucking stupid. How many times was the universe going to roll the dice on Rodney McKay before… before it was too late? John watched him leave the mess hall with Carson Beckett and tried not to be jealous. He has nothing to worry about there. McKay is currently all wound up over Jennifer Keller and much to John’s horror; he appeared to be winning that battle if Ronon’s mood was anything to go by.
John disposed of his dinner tray and found himself an empty balcony not far from his quarters to berate himself in private. It always came down to this… to this hard moment after everything was fixed. After the guns were put away and reports had been filed. It was his ritual; had become his ritual after so many wrong turns and hard moments. Moments filled with Rodney screaming his name and losing his mind. Moments filled with Rodney in the hands of a new enemy who had sliced through the heart of Atlantis like it was nothing. Moments only hours old… Rodney caught in a dart beam, Rodney on a goddamned Wraith hive.
He doesn’t know when it became unbearable… the thought of losing McKay. Maybe it had always been there in the back of his heart lurking in a hot twisted knot of pain just fucking waiting to surface. There are other moments in John’s mind. Moments filled with Rodney’s snarky chatter in an oddly sweet smelling forest on a beautiful day. Rodney at his computer in the lab berating his minions and demonstrating with his usual horrific lack of interpersonal skills how wrong, wrong, wrong they all are. Rodney at the Antarctica base demanding John to show him the galaxy. Rodney showing him an engagement ring. Rodney standing in front of him, a stuttering apology falling helplessly from his lips and John letting the transporter doors close on him. John fucking hated himself for that moment but like all the others—it blended into his mind and had become part of the fabric that made up McKay.
John let his head thud back against the wall and didn’t open his eyes as he feels the heat of a body sit down beside him. “Good job on rescuing yourself from the hive.”
“Thanks.” Rodney sighed. “I hate the smell.”
John snorted. God, the smell. A hive smelled like death. “So, I’m adding Carson to the list of people you aren’t allowed to play with anymore.”
“There’s a list?” Rodney asked amused. “I just thought it was Daniel Jackson.”
“He’s number one on general principal. That fucker just dies too often.” John closed his eyes. He couldn’t figure out how Jack O’Neill kept his sanity on the Daniel issue.
“He gets kidnapped a lot, too.”
“I think you and he are probably pretty close on that count. I’ll check the database.” John closed his eyes. “Everyone is really excited since you managed to get kidnapped together. I can’t imagine how much money has exchanged hands over that little bit of fresh hell.”
Rodney snorted. “Fuckers. So, Carson and Jackson.” He laughed. “Anyone else?”
Dr. Barbie, John thought viciously and then closed his eyes. He certainly couldn’t say that shit aloud. Though, Keller did have an alarming habit of getting her little ass kidnapped, captured, or otherwise detained while on missions. “Colonel Ellis because I’m pretty sure he’d lose you on purpose, Colonel Caldwell because I think he’d like to hold you hostage, gag you, and force you to work on his ship 24/7, everyone on PX3-Y89 because they are total assholes, the Genii, the Wraith, and our newly discovered, feral, anal probing Asgard neighbors.”
Rodney laughed. “Christ, Sheppard. At this rate I won’t even be able to leave my quarters.”
“That works for me,” John muttered. “I obviously should have chosen my geek more carefully. O’Neill warned me, you know. I think Radek would have been a better choice, really.”
“Your geek, huh?”
In every way I can get away with, Sheppard thought. “Yeah.”
“You do realize that O’Neill is actually fucking his geek, right?”
“I didn’t realize it was a requirement to having a geek.”
“Well, you know. We require special handling: lots of coffee, frequent orgasms, and appropriate amounts of food.”
“I got the coffee and food covered.”
“Yeah, but you dropped the ball on the blow jobs.” Rodney laughed softly at that.
“Are you saying that my performance as the military half of our intergalactic ass-kicking duo is subpar?” John demanded.
“I wouldn’t say subpar…exactly.” Rodney grinned at him. “Apparently you didn’t understand the full job description.”
John moved away from the wall, twisted around and slid into McKay’s lap so fast the other man barely had time to figure out what was going on. “I can fix that.”
“Sheppard…” Rodney’s eyes widened. “What the hell?” His hands drifted over John’s thighs and clenched on his hips.
“Shhh, McKay,” he admonished. “We’re about to have ‘thank-god-you-didn’t-die-sex’.”
“John… you can’t be serious…shit… I was joking!” Rodney’s shocked words fell against John’s lips as he took the stuttering scientist’s mouth in a kiss. “John… fuck…”
John chuckled as Rodney’s hands fisted in the back of his t-shirt to pull him closer. “You brought my performance into question, McKay. You have only yourself to blame for this.” He brushed his mouth over Rodney’s again and let his weight settle a little more.
“I can’t believe…”
John rested his forehead against Rodney’s. “McKay?”
“You can’t play with Jennifer anymore, either.”
“Hey, no fair, I lo-like her a lot.”
“You love me more.”
“Yeah. Yeah. I do.” Rodney gasped against John’s mouth. “He warned me.”
“Who warned you?” John slid one hand down between them and caught Rodney’s zipper with nimble fingers. He watched Rodney’s eyes darken with arousal and another moment settled between them.
“Jackson, he warned me…” Rodney shifted under him and groaned. “He said… one day you’ll be just sitting there and suddenly find yourself with a lapful of Air Force Colonel. That it was…” He shuddered. “Inevitable.”