I received a very passionate email about my last posting where I was pleaded with — this:

“Please, please warn next time you put any form of anal play in your het fic. And mark it off so that I can skip reading it.”

NO. I won’t.


This is a site full of PORN. Get over it, you fucking prude.


Keira Marcos

In my spare time, I write fanfiction and lead a cult of cock worshippers on the Internet. It's not the usual kind of hobby for a 40ish "domestic engineer" but we live in a modern world and I like fucking with people's expectations.


  1. Poor pet… better make sure you warn next time someone is gonna get, touched by a dick as well.

  2. Sometime i forget all the people don’t go into this fun part of a active sex life. Poor them.
    Had friend who was saying that it was a sin and us were like “bring all the lube and go away Manon”
    Anal was sin for her but cheating on her BF without using condom wasn’t, crazy woman.

  3. Ahahahahahaha!! Ha, ha.

    Honest now, have they like read any of your other fics? Ever?

    Life’s too short to feel that you have to limit porn in any way.

    (I’m a slasher, I read het *shrugs* Just give me the porn or not. Plot is good too.)

    • The only thing about anal is it’s like a treasure, only hubby does that, never let a man go near my asshole with his dick. Buddy is so happy to be the only man who boldly go where another man never gone before

      • Your comment honestly made me laugh!! 😀

        I still don’t get why the felt that anal play was a bad thing, it’s just o.O

        (on the other hand, don’t these people ever read Keira’s posts? What about the fact that she doesn’t give a shit don’t they get?)

  4. Ha. Really? I feel for the person’s sex partners. If he/she has any.

  5. ROTFLMAO! Why were they even here!?!

  6. just wondering if she read any of your other fics! Long live the porn!

  7. Word. We don’t warn for anal. Or any other consensual sex act, particularly when the site is clearly labeled as containing porn. Hell, you have a Porn Manifesto. There’s no way she could miss it, unless she’s entirely illiterate. Can we all just slap the silly bint with a dead carp?

    It’s considerate to warn for violence and child abuse and such, as some people have triggers. Not necessary IMHO, but considerate. I’ve always liked that about your work, though honestly, I have free will and if I come across something that freaks me out, I’m fully aware I can back up and leave at any time. Nobody forces me to read your work, though it may seem like I’m magically bound here sometimes. *g*

    If Bint of the Week has a trigger for anal exploration, what the twerk is she reading porn for??

  8. Just think, Keira, what an incredibly BORING sex life she must have! I bet she and her husband do it with the lights turned off and their eyes closed. Or maybe it’s like that scene from “Like Water For Chocolate” where she spreads the sheet over her body with the convenient hole right where the ol’ cooch is so poor Pedro doesn’t have to see any other part of his wife except the “important” part… and he doesn’t even really get to see THAT! It’s all surrounded by LACE!

    Shoot, anal play’s one of the most fun PARTS, is she KIDDING???

  9. I admire passion in a correspondent almost as much as I admire common sense, so your e-mailer is a bit of a wash, skewing to the side of OMG seriously?

    Newsflash: there is a specific sex act that is the anti-hot for me. It occurs a lot in no-holds-barred het and slash fiction. Do I ask for a warning? I do not. Do I skip the story? I do not. I skim the text if I’m in a persnickety mood and fucking cowboy up if I’m not.

    Cowboying up while reading your stories is remarkably easy, as the hot behind your no-holds-barred sex scenes is all the stuff going on between your characters. You are more than capable of selling me on anything the boys or girls do to each other is hot because it’s not the act, it’s the pleasure your people are always intent on giving each other.

    If a reader came to your work looking for a specific laundry list of sex acts and no others, I feel very sorry for him or her. They’re missing the point completely.

  10. I was sitting here trying to figure out that person’s hang up over what was really a nice sexy scene. Nope, I’ve got nothing. She is just a stuck up prude.

    I am loving your Harry Potter fics, btw. 🙂

  11. Tis the Season. Send her this:

  12. I have to agree with those who wonder if she has read ANYTHING of yours before cause REALLY your name alone should be all the warning anyone needs (I say this with pride and love and admiration).


  13. So they want a warning about ass play but are completely fine with the dragon-animagus-twin Harry sticking his forked tongue in places no forked tongue has been for thousands of years and having a good old wiggle around?…some people have weirdly specific hang-ups.


  14. Oh dear. Perhaps she’s never read the front page of this site? You know, the part that says–

    “Please don’t rain on my parade. If you can’t leave positive feedback don’t say anything at all.”

    I don’t see how it could be more plain. I wonder if she’s just here for the het?

  15. Seeing as the two current het fics of yours that I have been reading has 13/14 yr olds H&H just getting to heavy making out, and the Soul Bond series with H&H and them getting hot and heavy but no intercourse…Did I miss this or did I just read it and found it unremarkable and normal??

    Not that I’m saying your sex scenes are unremarkable…they are always VERY Remarkable and Very HOT!! ;- )

    I think the site’s “Porn Manifesto” gives one more than enough warning on what may be up for one’s reading pleasure.

  16. Honestly? I skip over the rimming. I don’t care if it’s het or slash I have zero interest in reading about it.

    I’m a bit germaphobic you see and the thought of it makes me gag. Which is weird because blow jobs and muff diving dont bother me at all. *shrugs*

    I’d never presume to tell you what to write anyway. I just scroll on past anything that doesn’t interest me and get on with life.

  17. Seriously? Where has she been with your other stories, or for that matter, the other chapters of this story? Come on, anal is no different than a blow or pussy-eating, except the direction of coming from the back instead of the front. If I come to a section that I do not like I skim down through that part and continue reading. Supposedly we are all adults here, not a kindergartener that runs and tattles that Little Johnny pulled my pigtails.

    Loved the vid – it says it all.

  18. Oh dear some people are very precious aren’t they……….

    I think your sex scenes are extremely HOT! Maybe they need to widen their horizons a wee bit….

  19. That is… slightly perplexing. Anal play is something I’ve never even considered needing to be warned for. Enticed by, yes; warned for, no.

  20. Rampant stupidity annoys me. Foisting their shitty lives off on others is just unacceptable. This person should shut off the internet and keep their nose out of our PORN loving lives!!!

  21. Well, maybe you need to change your disclaimer just a tiny smidge. Like right after you should be 17 yrs old, you could add and have an adult mind – cause obviously chronological age just aint enough for some people. Or not., it’s your site and sometimes it’s just fun to let go and tell people what you think – your so shy and retiring, I know that’s not easy for you but you just have to buck up and soldier through.

  22. have to agree you would have to be thick to not realise there is porn in the story by the way loving the story and thought the song was brilliant showed it to my husband

  23. Ahahahahaha! That vid! And , seriously, have they never read here? Bah…

  24. Well given everything you say on to your home page about what to expect from your writing – I think NO is the appropriate response…nuff said :S

  25. Is that person really that dumb? I ,mean your site warns of that you have to be an adult and that there is sex. Can the person’s sex life really be that vanilla (if they have one at all of course)? If the person does have a sex life it must be pretty boring she/he can’t be a very good lover if a little thing like talking about anal play is going to squick them that much.

  26. It’s rather the height of self-centered-ness to demand an author alert you to your specific squick. There are some thing I don’t like, but I just skip over them and get on with it. If everyone got a warning label for every pet peeve, the warnings would be longer than the story.

  27. bawahahahahaha! This latest chapter was very hot and the video was ….. * gigglesnorts* soooo funny! * le sigh* now I have to wait a week for the next update….

  28. Bahahahahahahaha….does this person know you at all? LOL

  29. That… REALLY!? Nothing new to add. Just.. That person neads to snap out of it… Actually, I just thought of something insulting.. To me that is.. I think that person assosiates male gay sex with *dirty*.

    As in ass sex *has* to be only for gay men because we do not have vaginas and it is unappealing. *It’s not their fault, they were born that way…*

    Thanks Lady.

  30. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Ummmmm can you put in het anal play into every chapter randomly from now on just to piss them off?

  31. *Keira Marcos
    In my spare time I write fan fiction and lead a cult of cock worshippers on Facebook. It’s not the usual kind of hobby for a “domestic engineer” in her 30’s but we live in a modern world and I like fucking with people’s expectations.*

    PLUS ON THE HOMEPAGE: Porn Manifesto

    Anal Play……. DUH! NO BRAINER!

    No Actually All Keira’s Characters a covered from the Neck to their Ankles, they don’t believe in sex before marriage and even then they “Think of England” ……….Note the Sarcasm

  32. LOLOLOLOL you are nicer than me. My response would have been to write a pegging scene and C+P it into my reply e-mail to make ABSOLUTELY SURE they didn’t miss it.

  33. If the fic had included, I don’t know, scat and erotic amputation, unexpectedly in the middle of a bunch of rose-petal romance, maybe I could muster up some sympathy for the poor child, but “anal play”? I guess we should all just be grateful the request didn’t include slashfic. “Mark it off”? Really? Throw all the other readers out of the story they’re enjoying, so your oh-so-delicate sensibilities aren’t offended?

    News flash, presumably young and innocent person: dicks like it in there. Good luck finding a partner who will pretend otherwise without getting it on the side.

    Keira, seriously, I don’t know how you do it. I’m so grateful you prefer to rant about these idiots instead of taking your toys and going home.

  34. So, I’m late to the party but that’s pretty normal for me actually. I’ve only just taken the time to read the HP series, mostly due to work, but recently I took a holiday and downloaded the whole thing before taking off to parts unknown for some R&R,(reading & reading) and I’ve got this to say: fuckin fantastic and that’s from a lesbian who isn’t much into ‘het sex’.

    I worked up to reading the PH series, not because I was squicked by the ‘het sex’, ( kinda am, but I’m not gonna tell people they shouldn’t write it, thats just arrogant and anyway a good sex scene is a good sex scene straight, slash or femslash) but because I’m old, like really old and I felt a little like a cradle snatcher, just, even thinking about reading the ‘het sex’ these little people get up to.

    Keira Marcos writes a good story, she’s one of my favourite authors, I think I’d follow her down the rabbit hole just to see what she’d write down there, enjoy the writing, skip the bits you don’t like but really if you do that you miss the good stuff.

    Sorry, I’m sick and I’ve overdosed on the good medicine.

  35. Wow, where was I in 2013? How did I miss this. LOL

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