Reading Time: 101 Minutes

Title: When I See You Again
Series: Nature Provides
Series Order: 7
Author: Keira Marcos
Fandom: 9-1-1, The Sentinel, Stargate: SG-1, Stargate: Atlantis, NCIS
Relationship: Evan Buckley/Eddie Diaz, OMC/Lou Ransone, OMC/OMC, OFC/OFC, Isabel Diaz/OFC, Bobby Nash/Athena Grant
Genre: Romance, Alternate Universe, Sentinel Fusion, Established Relationship
Warnings: Explicit sex, Canon-Typical Violence, Angst, Discussion-Murder, Discussion-Child Abuse, Discussion-Domestic Violence, Referenced-Rape, Discussion-Racism, Discussion-Police Brutality, Discussion-Serial Killer, Character Ascension, Ableism, Homophobia, Original Character Death
Word Count: 51,402
Author’s Note: The warnings encompass my entire series. Casting available on the series page. Also, as is my yearly custom, here is a present for you on my birthday.
Summary: Alpha Ascendant Sentinel Evan Buckley ascended on live national television, effectively outing the Stargate Program in a way no one had ever expected possible. Eight months later, a tsunami hits the Santa Monica pier, and Evan Buckley sets himself down right in the middle of it to save the life of his Guide and one of their children. Buck will do anything to keep his family safe. Not even ascension is going to stand in his way.

* * * *

Chapter 1

Eddie didn’t make a habit of going to the Los Angeles Center for Psionics. It was a new facility as the Burton Foundation had started to restructure itself in the wake of the Stargate Program’s declassification. He didn’t pretend to understand all of the politics involved, but the fact that Sentinels were defending Earth from hostile aliens on and off the planet had sent everyone reeling. It became even more of an issue when it was revealed that thousands upon thousands of humans had been stolen from their world and used as slaves by a parasitic alien species.

The SGC wasn’t hurting for recruitment, and the Burton Foundation had tasked itself with preparing to defend their world from an alien invasion on a local level in ways that some governments were concerned about but couldn’t control. There were hundreds of treaties and agreements protecting their kind, and he was grateful for that, at least. It had certainly protected him when the Army had requested that he return to service just four months after he’d lost Buck. He’d been appalled and furious by their callous request that had come at him in the flavor of a patriotic guilt trip. They didn’t care about his grief or his two deeply traumatized children.

Still, despite the fact that the Burton Foundation sheltered him in a variety of legal and social ways, he wasn’t interested in being a part of their organization and didn’t participate in the local efforts. As part of Lou Ransone’s personal pride, absolutely no one intruded on Eddie’s space in Los Angeles. Unfortunately, there were political issues coming his way from Texas that left him so furious he could barely breathe. So, he’d shown up when it was requested by the national Alpha Prime pair so he could tell Colton Beauregard no to his face again.

He hadn’t seen Tony DiNozzo since they’d explained the Stargate Program to him and told him where Buck was. Eddie had already figured out that the psionic plane had taken his Sentinel from him, but the specifics hadn’t been undesired. The details wouldn’t matter because he was going to get Buck back one way or another, and he didn’t give a fuck what anyone else thought about it. He’d put the universe itself on notice if need be.

“Nice beard,” Tony said warmly, and several people in the room made little noises of dissatisfaction.

He hadn’t shaved since…well. Eddie cleared his throat. “It’s good to see you, Tony.” Eddie leaned on the window ledge and watched the people from Texas get settled at the table he had no intention of sitting at. “I don’t appreciate being emotionally blackmailed into this room.”

“That’s a harsh assessment,” Hamilton Beauregard, the alpha of El Paso and Colton’s father, said roughly. “You’ve ignored repeated attempts at a conversation, and it became clear that you were being influenced to ignore us. It’s inappropriate for Dr. Salas to hold you hostage on the off chance that his son is returned to the living.”

Eddie glared at him, and psionic energy drifted over his skin despite his best efforts. “Absolutely no one has the ability to hold me hostage, Alpha Beauregard. And I’ve never allowed anyone to influence me into doing anything less than exactly what I wanted to do. You’d know that very well, considering the ham-fisted campaign your pride engaged in regarding my rejection of the spoiled rotten and selfish man-child you raised.”

“We’re made for one another,” Colton blurted out. “And you rejected me for a stupid reason. Now, look at you, standing there with a broken and rotting bond. You can’t be in this situation of your own free will. I don’t even believe your bond with Evan Buckley was consensual to begin with!”

Eddie exhaled slowly and looked at Cristobal. The older man just shrugged. They’d never discussed the state of his bond with Buck with anyone, and he really didn’t want to use it as a weapon in a conversation he didn’t want to have. He wouldn’t be in the building at all if the Beauregard family hadn’t threatened to file a complaint and force a federal investigation into what they assumed to be some sort of abusive situation.

“My father-in-law has done nothing but shelter and protect me since his son ascended in the defense of my life,” Eddie said evenly. “We aren’t even close to made for each other, Colton. We are, at best, psionically compatible. But the fact is that I can’t stand you. I think you’re arrogant, immature, and awful.” He huffed a little and averted his gaze when Tony DiNozzo cleared his throat.

“We can bring in an impartial third party to evaluate Guide Diaz’s psionic circumstances,” Tony said mildly. “But I believe it would be unnecessarily intrusive. It’s only been eight months since the loss of his Sentinel, so he most certainly doesn’t have a rotting bond. That sort of thing can take up to five years to develop. Moreover, his grandmother is a shaman, and I know for a fact that she would not let Eddie suffer such a condition. Nor would she have allowed him to be bonded against his will. If she’d bonded in her youth, Isabel Diaz would be the Alpha Guide Prime of North America instead of me.”

Colton huffed but stayed in his seat when his father’s Guide, Charles Royce, put a hand on his arm. “He isn’t even taking care of his appearance—what Guide has a full beard?”

Eddie crossed his arms. “I know I look great with this beard.”

Rampart sighed. “It is nice.”

Eddie grinned and shrugged when Tony laughed. “Listen, I’m here to tell you to your face for the last time, Colton, that I will never, ever consider bonding with you. I realize I’m the closest match you’ve ever gotten in the system, but we are fundamentally wrong for each other.”

“I don’t believe it,” Colton said. “You never even gave me a chance.”

“You told me I’d have to give up custody of my own child!” Eddie snapped, and Tony frowned. “You said that I was selfish for wanting to parent my child and that I would have to focus all of my attention on my Sentinel. But even if you’d changed your mind about that disgusting notion, it’s too late. I’ve had perfect, and I would never, ever settle for anything less than what was taken from me.”

“Perfect,” Colton repeated with a glare. “With Buckley?”

“Yes,” Eddie said and took a deep breath. “We are psionically identical. It was like meeting the other half of my soul. I want for nothing in my bond. I can’t see how I’d ever let anyone replace him.”

“And you think that’s healthy, Eddie?” Charles Royce questioned. “These people are just going to let you…waste your potential? Your bond fragment will rot.”

Eddie focused on his fellow Guide. “Take a really good look at me, Charles, and believe me when I say this. I don’t have a broken bond.” The older man’s mouth dropped open. “In fact, my bond with my Sentinel is stronger now than it ever has been. Even now, he’s on the psionic plane watching over me, and I’ve felt his gaze on me since the moment he ascended.

“Buck is with me every single moment of every single day. And sometimes, if I’m incredibly still, I can feel his hand in mine. At night, our little girl hums the song he used to sing to her when she would fight going to sleep. She’s eighteen months old.” He held out a hand, and Nova appeared under it; she rubbed her head against his fingers. “And his spirit animal hasn’t left my side since the night of the bombing.” He paused. “But I also haven’t seen my own since. I think she’s with him on the plane, and that’s exactly where I want her to be. Do you understand?”

“I do,” Charles said quietly. “Is your bond primal? I didn’t think so…since he appears to be basically dead.”

“We already know that ascension doesn’t equal death,” Tony said, even as Cristobal Salas took in a deep breath. “I’ve met a man who ascended and returned to a mortal body.”

“Yes, a Guide,” Hamilton interjected. “And I wonder if that’s a distinction that matters. It’s been eight months. How long do you plan to wait, Guide Diaz?”

Eddie took a deep breath. “If he doesn’t return to me, I’ll raise our children and live the best possible life I can for them until I’m sure they’ll be okay without me, then I’ll ascend.” Even Cristobal looked surprised. “Time means nothing in the end.”

“You think you can just ascend?” Colton questioned. “Just like that?”

“I know I can, and I would’ve already done it if it weren’t for our children.”

“That baby isn’t even yours,” Colton snapped, clearly frustrated. He brushed off his father’s Guide and lurched from the table. “Like your biological child wasn’t enough of a burden? You had to go and adopt some charity case, too. It’s like you’re incapable of serving the tribe.”

“I don’t see how you can stand here and think any of that and believe we’re compatible,” Eddie said, and Colton glared at him. “I killed for the first time when I was eighteen by shoving roughly twelve inches of carbon steel into a man’s gut without a single hesitation. I was defending myself and the soldiers serving with me on a forward operating base in Afghanistan. The night I came online, I killed upwards of twenty insurgents by myself, defending my tribe.

“When I was discharged from the Army, and after I healed from being shot three times in the line of duty, I became a firefighter so I could continue to protect my tribe to the best of my ability. You’ve never once, in your overprivileged life, served the tribe, Colton. And since your main concern in bonding with a Guide is how they’ll serve you, it is disgusting that you’d question my service in any single way.”

“But you’re a Guide,” Colton said in confusion. “The military doesn’t put unbonded Guides in combat positions. You were a medic.”

“A combat medic,” Eddie corrected. “And latent Guides and Sentinels rarely receive special assignments. I don’t know how you think the military works, but soldiers aren’t coddled and treated with kid gloves, no matter their online status. I’ve never met a military Guide who didn’t have a body count. Frankly, if I’d bonded with another soldier, I’d probably be in a combat zone right now. Which is why I refused a search through the DOD’s system.”

He lifted his hand off Nova’s head, and she shimmered away. “This conversation is over. If you file some sort of complaint and make a baseless accusation against Dr. Salas—I’ll hold a press conference and break hearts from here to the Hague. If you think harassing a grieving and presumed-to-be widowed Alpha Guide would be well received by the public, then you’re all idiots.

“My Sentinel sacrificed himself in my defense for the whole world to see, and there are plenty of people who think it was romantic. Imagine how all of those bleeding hearts would react if they knew some asshole I can’t stand is trying to emotionally blackmail me into abandoning my children so I can endure a bond I don’t want.” He paused. “Honestly, you’re so selfish I don’t know how you aren’t already dormant….”

“Son of a bitch,” Tony said lowly and stood. “Alpha Guide Royce!”

Charles Royce stood and bowed his head. “Alpha Guide Prime DiNozzo.”

“Is your Sentinel’s son descending into dormancy?”

“I….” Charles just took a deep breath.

Cristobal stood, walked around the table, and cupped Eddie’s elbow. “We’re done.”

“Wait a minute,” Hamilton said and stood. “My son isn’t dormant, and Guide Diaz is the best choice for him. Colton has the right to a bond!”

“Charles Royce,” Tony ground out through clenched teeth, his voice heavy with empathic influence. “Answer my question.”

“Colton’s in the first stages of prolapse,” Charles said quietly. “It can be treated, as you know, but he must bond soon, and he’s stubbornly refused to do another search. He only wants….” His gaze flicked to Eddie. “Someone he can’t have.”

“We should’ve never let you leave El Paso,” Colton said. “You don’t know your place.”

Eddie stared at him in silence for a moment. “I’ll kill you.”

“Excuse me?” Colton questioned, eyes going with shock.

“If you ever lay a hand on me, Colton, I will kill you. Do your mother a favor and go back to Texas immediately.” He focused on Hamilton. “And no, your son doesn’t have the right to a bond. He has the right to seek one. He has the right to protect one. He even has the right to want one. But no Sentinel in this country is legally entitled to a bond with a Guide. If you want to buy your son a slave, you can migrate to Russia, where the rest of the morally bankrupt assholes go to circumvent basic human rights.”

He let Cristobal take him out of the room at that point because the older man was clearly in distress, and Eddie hated to be a source of upset for Buck’s father. Shortly, they were in the locked office that Lou had in the building but rarely used. Cristobal’s hands were shaking.

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not,” Cristobal said shortly. “I protested that meeting repeatedly. Tony said it would be best if we just got it over with, and I guess he was right. But I didn’t know that asshole was skirting toward prolapse.”

“Royce kept touching him,” Eddie said roughly. “I think he’s acting as a conservator. Colton’s psionic profile is muted. Did you notice?”

“Not until you suggested he should be dormant. I don’t make a habit of scanning others like that,” Cristobal said. “He’s a corrupt little bastard. I can see why he put you off so much the first time you met him. Beyond his old-fashioned and ugly beliefs, he’s just psionically unpleasant.”

“It’s worse now than it was,” Eddie said. “I think the threat of prolapse is eroding his ethics by degrees.”

“Then I’ll have Lou sanction him and ban his return to California,” Cristobal said roughly. “I’d rather you not have to be investigated for homicide—not even a justified one.”

Eddie huffed. “I can get rid of a body.”

“Shut up,” Cristobal said with a laugh then he sobered. “Can you really ascend?”

“Yeah, I think so,” Eddie said quietly. “I could use our bond to follow Buck right onto the plane, and I will eventually if he doesn’t return. I won’t…leave the kids until they’re ready, but I ache for him.” He took a deep breath as Cristobal cupped the back of his head and pulled him into a hug. “Sometimes, I wish your son wasn’t so easy to love.”

“Me, too,” Cristobal whispered hoarsely.

* * * *

“We had them all escorted to the airport and put on a private plane,” Tony said as he sat down on the coffee table in front of Eddie. “Lou has submitted an official sanction notification to the Burton Foundation and the Alpha Primes of the Southern region. He’s been barred from California.”

Eddie nodded. “Okay.”

“And if he finds some way to come at you in any fashion, do exactly what you told him you’d do,” Tony said. “There are a host of laws that protect you from that kind of behavior, Eddie, and you know it even if he somehow doubts it. Do you have a weapon?”

“You mean a gun?” Eddie questioned, and Tony nodded. “No, and I don’t want one. I honestly don’t need one. I’ve been doing mixed martial arts since high school, and despite not working in the field right now, I’m deadlifting over 300 pounds on the regular.”

Tony nodded. “Right.” He sat back a little. “Are you going to go back to firefighting?”

“I’m working in Metro Dispatch,” Eddie said. “It’s the LAFD’s internal dispatch center, and it’s not the work I want to do. It is the work I can do right now. Yes, I’d like to go back to work in the field, but I don’t know if I want to do it without Buck. Maybe a year from now, I’ll feel differently. The schedule I have currently allows me to be home with the kids during the hours I think they need me most. Neither of them sleeps well if I’m not at home.”

“Do you have your oldest in therapy?” Tony questioned.

“Yes, of course,” Eddie said and frowned at him.

“Sorry, I’m just…floundering,” the older Guide said. “I’m a fixer, and there’s no way for me to fix this for you. It’s driving me nuts. If I could go up there, knock on the door, and get your man back, I would. This situation with Colton Beauregard is frustrating as hell, and I’m sorry I allowed them to come here. I thought it was mostly political posturing.”

“We all thought it was,” Eddie said. “I thought he was trying to bond with a strong Guide so he could take his father’s place. But now we know it’s a more desperate matter. What I don’t think any of them understand is that prolapse is what happens when the psionic plane retreats from someone. There are different reasons for the retreat, but in Colton’s case, it’s nature making a correction. Not everyone who is gifted genetically as a Sentinel or Guide genuinely deserves to be a part of us or the psionic plane itself.”

“I’ve heard that said about dormancy as well,” Tony said quietly. “Plenty of people refuse to accept it as the truth.”

“They don’t have to accept it to be true,” Eddie said and shrugged and checked his watch. “I’ve wasted my whole damn Saturday with this crap.”

“I’m sorry for that,” Tony said, left the coffee table, and slouched into a chair across from Eddie. “The more I read about the SGC and their operation, the worse I feel about everything, including the ancients and their so-called enlightenment. Dr. Jackson is clearly conflicted by their circumstances as he seems to have affection for individuals but, on the whole, finds them offensive. He said a few months ago that he didn’t know why the psionic plane even tolerated them because most of them were morally bankrupt.”

“Their history certainly speaks to that,” Eddie said roughly. “They sought ascension and ran from a problem of their own making in Pegasus—leaving the innocent to suffer and be fed on for over 10,000 years. It’s disgusting. If…well, if I had no family responsibilities, I’d be in Pegasus right now making a hobby out of killing the wraith. Because I’m uncertain about the ancients’ place in the universe, but I know for certain that a creature that eats psionic energy should not exist.”

“Rand is considering retiring to Pegasus so he can sit on some planet and take out wraith that come through the gate with a sniper rifle,” Tony said wryly. “I doubt he’s the only Sentinel who is interested in picking a stargate out on some random populated planet in that galaxy and making it their own.”

“I’d be okay with a sniper rifle or a cannon,” Eddie muttered. “I’m not picky.”

Tony nodded. “That tracks.” He paused and seemed to consider his words. “Are you worried that Colton Beauregard might come at you physically? Force the issue?”

“He’s stupid,” Eddie said shortly. “And desperate, and we both know those circumstances don’t mix well. I consider him a threat to my children, Tony, and that’s not going to equal his survival if he ever comes back to California. And I don’t agree with Charles Royce about his condition—it’s not early-stage prolapse. You had to feel the greed pouring off of Colton.”

“Yeah.” Tony exhaled slowly. “And the lust. He wants you desperately and didn’t appear to hear a word you said until the end.” He stared for a moment. “Why didn’t you tell us that your bond with Buck is still intact?”

“It’s very intimate,” Eddie said shortly. “And I will not consent to any sort of bond assessment. You can tell anyone who asks that I will burn shit to the ground if they try it any fashion. There isn’t a Guide on this planet that could try to probe me psionically without my notice.”

“Oh, I know,” Tony said. “It’s easy to see why you hide your ascendant status, Eddie, but there’s going to come a day when you might have to come out swinging. I’m not sure if I look forward to that day or not. There hasn’t been a recorded Alpha Ascendant Guide in several hundred years, and the fact that you bonded to an Alpha Ascendant Sentinel is mind-blowing.”

“I didn’t expect our bond to grow and change the way it did,” Eddie said quietly. “You know he never intended on allowing a Guide in his life at all due to the way his birth family treated him.” Tony nodded. “But we fell in love like it was the most natural thing in the world. My son, Christopher, embraced Buck like a parent from practically the start, and he loves Bea in the unconditional way that only kids can love.” He blinked back tears. “We were considering a surrogate next year after Bea was potty trained. Christopher says our family is broken. He’s learned enough about the Stargate Program to understand that Buck could come back, so he doesn’t know why he hasn’t.”

“It doesn’t appear that Daniel Jackson had any sort of choice in it,” Tony said. “I think if you’re Sentinel could return, then he would have the moment he could’ve.”

“I know,” Eddie said. “And I’ve worked hard to make him understand that Buck isn’t staying away from us on purpose. He’s just incredibly young and hurt by the loss.”

“Does he resent Buck?”

“No,” Eddie shook his head. “He just misses him, and if it ever turns toward anger, it will be the psionic plane that bears the brunt of the blame. A few months ago, Christopher asked me why the psionic plane was holding Buck hostage. It doesn’t help matters that Jarra, his spirit animal, has taught him a lot about the workings of the psionic plane. So, he has a profound understanding of the power that exists there.”

“About your little girl,” Tony said, and Eddie focused on him. “Is she humming from memory, or is she responding to his psionic presence?”

“She’s tethered to us both empathically, as I’m sure you know,” Eddie said, and Tony nodded. “That tether wasn’t damaged by his ascension either. If anything, he clings to it as much as he does our bond. As to your question, I think it’s a mixture of both.”

“What’s the song?” Tony asked.

“The version of Dream a Little Dream of Me by The Mamas & the Papas.”

“That honestly makes me want to cry,” Tony said frankly.

“Sorry,” Eddie said. “It made me sad at first, as well. But it clearly comforts her, so I just started picking her up and humming it with her when she does it.”

 

Chapter 2

Eddie didn’t accept phone calls from his mother and hadn’t since her bitch fit over his grandmother’s bonding with Jetta Watney. Well, she’d had a series of angry tantrums over it, but the last one had been so deeply homophobic and disgusting that even his father had been stunned by it. Ramon hadn’t left her, but he’d put down a deep divide between her and his own family.

He really didn’t want to talk to his father, either, but ignoring the man was difficult. So, Eddie picked up his cell phone and exhaled slowly. “Hey, Pop.”

“Eddie,” Ramon said. “I’ve been told…. Hamilton Beauregard called me furious and told me that you threatened to kill his son.”

“His son looks the sort that doesn’t take no for an answer,” Eddie said evenly, and Ramon hissed in shock. “They came here and tried to tell me to move on like that’s something I can easily do. I don’t even want to do it.”

“You’ll spend the rest of your life alone, then?” Ramon questioned. “Don’t the kids…deserve better?”

“Neither of my children would accept me trying to replace Buck, Pop,” Eddie said roughly. “I’m not saying I’d never have another relationship if Buck doesn’t return, but it won’t ever be anything like that. Frankly, I don’t know how anyone would tolerate a long-term, romantic relationship with someone like me.”

“What do you mean by that?” Ramon said roughly. “There’s nothing wrong with you.”

“No, I mean…would you want to marry someone who was irrevocably in love with someone else?” Eddie questioned. “Knowing you’d come fourth in their life no matter how you feel? Because I’d never put anyone before my kids and Buck…well, there’s no replacing what I had with him, and I’d never try.”

“You’re so young,” Ramon said quietly. “I can’t fault him for doing what he had to do to keep you safe, but I hate this situation for you.”

“Did you honestly expect me to accept Colton now and return to El Paso?” Eddie questioned.

“Your mother did,” Ramon said. “And it’s selfish, but it would’ve made my life easier. Hamilton said that we’d get custody of Christopher, and the baby would be left in California with Dr. Salas.”

“Put her on the phone,” Eddie snapped, and his father took in a breath.

“We’re on speaker,” Ramon said quietly.

“Great, so listen carefully because I’m only going to say this once to the two of you,” Eddie said in a low voice. He didn’t want to start yelling since both kids were down for naps. “There will never be a day when you have custody of my son. And I would not abandon my daughter in any circumstances. You’re not going to understand this because you’re both morally bankrupt, but I love Bea just as much as I love Christopher. I couldn’t love her more if I’d actually somehow managed to give birth to her.

“I am psionically and empathically invested in my children to such a degree that I know exactly where they are at all times. This is the last time I will ever speak to either of you about this, and I mean it. You aren’t qualified to take care of Christopher, and moreover, the Burton Foundation would consider it profoundly abusive to let either of you try, considering Mom’s behavior in the past and her disgusting beliefs. Christopher is a burgeoning shaman and a wolf Guide.”

“I don’t believe that bullshit!” Helena shouted. “He’s crippled and probably dormant!”

“Your ignorance, ableism, and bigotry doesn’t change the facts,” Eddie said wearily. “Look, I’ve had a stressful day, and I don’t have the room to deal with your mental illness, Mom. Colton Beauregard has been banned from returning to California. And be assured, if he manages to get near me again, I’ll kill him. You can tell his parents that, too. Because it was disgusting to be in the same room with him, and I won’t tolerate it again.”

“You’re ruining our lives,” Ramon said roughly. “The Beauregard family and their pride blame us for your defiance. I’ve been told that I should be prepared to move my business out of El Paso.”

“Then complain to the Burton Foundation,” Eddie said. “Prides aren’t the fucking mafia, Pop. He can’t just kick you out of El Paso because I won’t bend over for his dumb bastard of a son. You’ve also done nothing to deserve to be sanctioned by them and present no sort of threat of any kind to their pride or any other pride in that region. Mom earned her banishment from California repeatedly, and you know it. For fuck’s sake, she called the former Beta Sentinel of the Pacific West a slur I can’t bring myself to repeat. I was so embarrassed and ashamed of Mom’s behavior that I could barely look Jetta Watney in the eye for weeks afterward.”

“Your grandmother is ridiculous,” Helena snapped. “She had no business bonding at her age! It’s disgusting, and she knew better when she was younger. Isabel is clearly suffering some kind of dementia.”

“Mind your own fucking business,” Eddie snapped and ignored his mother’s outraged squawk. “My abuela is fully competent mentally and doesn’t owe a single person on this whole goddamned planet any sort of explanation regarding her bond or her Sentinel.” He pinched the bridge of his nose as he heard Bea start to stir. “I have to go. You’ve pissed me off so much I woke up the baby.”

He hung up before either of them could say another word and tossed his phone on the sofa as he left the living room. Bea was standing up in her crib, hands curling over the top of the side railing as she bounced a little. The sour look she gave him was a hundred percent Buck, and it startled him so much that he laughed. Eddie picked her up and pressed a kiss against her plump cheek.

“Sorry, Mija.” He took a deep breath against her hair as she relaxed against his chest. “My parents are awful. I wish…well. I wish for a lot of things. It would be great if I could depend on them to support me, now more than ever. I can’t, and I have to accept that.”

“Is she okay?”

Eddie focused on Christopher, who had finally meandered from his bedroom and down the hall. He’d hoped that his son would stay in bed and continue his nap, as he was clearly tired from having spent the morning on the beach with Everstar. “She’s fine. I just got myself worked up a little and…well, I can’t say for certain that it woke her up, but it certainly felt like it did.”

Christopher nodded. “She’s sensitive when she’s tired.” He yawned. “And she’s been going full tilt since she learned to walk. What’s for dinner?”

“Let’s see what Carla left,” Eddie said, and his son nodded.

He had to admit their mealtimes had changed a lot without Buck around to manage that whole thing for him. Eddie could cook and certainly did; he just sort of hated it. Fortunately, the number of adults that came in and out of his apartment guaranteed he rarely had to. Cristobal and Lou meal prepped for them so much that he should be embarrassed, but it was clear that the older men considered it something they could do to make things easier.

Carla had left them a dish of chicken and rice. A favorite of Christopher’s, and Bea was never opposed to rice, so it would work out. Everstar was seated at the kitchen table with her earbuds in front of her laptop. One of the biggest changes had come when she’d suggested that she just move into the building. She was sharing an apartment two floors above them with an unbonded Guide that she knew from school. Though, honestly, she rarely did more than sleep in the apartment she’d been given in the building.

She pulled out her earbuds and shoved them into her backpack. “Hey.”

“Hey.” Eddie bounced Bea gently as she huffed and nuzzled against his neck. “I took tomorrow off, so you can go to that party.”

“Thanks, I really appreciate it,” Everstar said and picked up her phone. “I normally avoid big parties, but I got a giant guilt trip since it’s Sheri’s birthday. Apparently, I’m required to be excited about the fact that she can drink legally.”

Eddie laughed. “It’s a big birthday.”

“Sure,” Everstar said. “But you know that drinking isn’t an option for me.”

He’d never been drunk in his life and rarely ever had more than a single beer, if that, at any event. He hadn’t had a drink at all since he’d come online, as he didn’t want to take any risks with his empathy. “Mundanes don’t always get how dangerous it could be for a Guide or even a sensitive latent to get intoxicated. What’s the schedule look like?”

“Universal Studios during the day and a dance club in the evening. We’ll be getting dinner at some swanky grown-up place that we have to dress up for. We’re staying in a hotel in Santa Barbara that her parents are paying for. It’s all girls at the hotel, but we’re meeting a group of guys at the dance club. Her boyfriend tried to horn in on the Universal Studios thing but bailed when she said he’d have to buy his own ticket.”

“Sheri’s parents don’t like him,” Christopher reported.

“He’s a loser,” Everstar said and put her books away. “But Sheri makes a habit of dating guys like that. It’s like she wants to be a rehab center for badly raised men when she grows up.”

Eddie laughed and surrendered Bea to Everstar when his daughter reached out for the young woman. Everstar took her with a bright grin and wiggled her gently as Bea laughed.

“Hey, beautiful,” Everstar said and blew a raspberry against Bea’s cheek. “Did you have a good nap?”

“Star.” Bea bounced in Everstar’s arms and tried to blow against her cheek in return, which made them all laugh. “Da loud.”

“I lost my temper,” Eddie said. “She doesn’t seem to discern between loud emotions and loud sounds.”

Everstar nodded. “Her hearing appears to be in the normal range.”

“We’re keeping an eye on it,” Eddie admitted. “Due to her psionic bath the day she was born and the visual acuity, there is some concern that she might skew ascendant.” He focused on Christopher and found him staring at the table. “Hungry, Mijo?”

“Yeah, sure,” Christopher said with a shrug.

Eddie glanced toward Everstar, who made a little motion with her head that spoke to a future conversation, and he nodded. He fixed plates for Christopher and Bea to be heated up even as Everstar tucked the baby in her highchair.

He forced himself to focus on the meal and get the kids through it without asking Everstar any questions to draw attention to whatever the problem was. After dinner, he gave Bea a bath in the sink while Christopher took a shower. He ended up listening to Everstar read Christopher a story and was kind of bummed that his son had asked her instead of him for it. By the time he got Bea down for the night, Everstar was packed and ready to head home.

“Sorry,” Eddie said quietly as he sat down at the table. He noted that she’d put the dishes in the dishwasher. “You didn’t have to clean up.”

“It’s no problem,” she said easily. “I get a conservator salary around here these days—so I certainly get paid enough.”

Eddie nodded. “Okay, what’s going on?”

“A few times, here and there, Christopher’s mentioned that he doesn’t want to be a problem for you. I’ve been trying to figure out what he means by that, and I do try to keep his confidences on the little things. It’s important for him to trust me.” Eddie nodded. “But this is different.”

“You can just say it,” Eddie said. “If he’s having a problem, I really need to know.”

“It’s not his problem—it’s yours,” she admitted. “At least, it certainly should be your problem, and he’s trying to take it on for himself, which isn’t cool. I think, normally, he’s very good at communicating.”

“Agreed.”

“A few weeks ago, I had that big exam and couldn’t pick him up from school.”

Eddie nodded. “Carla picked him for me. I didn’t think it was a big deal. He loves Carla.”

“That part didn’t make it a big deal,” Everstar said. “The next day, one of the teachers at his school asked him how many people you had on staff to take care of him and his sister.”

Eddie frowned. “What?”

“Then she apparently speculated on how much of a financial burden it must be to pay for two employees,” she continued. “And private school.”

“So, a misinformed mundane.”

“Yes, and I know you’ve been on the fence about moving him from Morgan Academy and into the Burton Academy because he was happy in the school. But I think it’s only a month into the new school year and that you should move him as soon as possible. He needs….” She frowned and trailed off. “Sorry, it’s not my place to speak to you like this.”

“Hey,” Eddie said gently. “Listen, I need the perspective, okay? I never went to a Burton school at all, so I guess I don’t know the value of it. Tell me what you’re thinking.”

“There is safety in being with our own kind,” Everstar said quietly. “And I know Morgan should be a safe place for him because they have very good policies in place for disabled students and that you’re worried about moving him into an environment with a bunch of abled-bodied children, but it won’t be like it was in an LA public school.”

“I put him in public school when we first got here because he’d been in public school in El Paso and seemed to like it. I think, though, in retrospect, that he only agreed to it because his mother and mine were so adamant that he should. Neither of them wanted him to be latent, and I think my mother would’ve found a way to force him dormant to back up her assumptions if she could’ve.”

“I hate both of those heifers,” Everstar muttered. “I went to a Burton school from the start—I was labeled sensitive before I could even walk. So, I never had a public school experience to compare it to. But there were kids in my classes that had disabilities—including a latent Guide that was born blind. Developmental delays aren’t unheard of amongst latent children as well.

“Regardless, I had a great experience in school from the very start. The classes are small, and the teachers are prepared to deal with a variety of issues in regard to latency and prides. He also won’t have to deal with an ignorant teacher creating problems where they shouldn’t exist. I told him that the Burton Foundation pays for me and Carla to work for you when he finally brought it up with me today. He was very relieved because he thought maybe you’d have to work a lot to pay for everything.”

Eddie took a deep breath. “Everstar, I don’t have to work at all.”

She blinked in surprise. “What?”

“I became the executor of Buck’s trust fund when he ascended. As it turned out, he inherited a lot of money from his grandmother as he was her only latent grandchild, and she was very proud of him. You might know her name—Beatrice Carson Mallory.”

Her mouth dropped open. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah.” Eddie shook his head. “It took me by surprise, too. He never discussed his family of origin, but I do know that both of his grandparents were dead when he was disowned.”

“I did a paper on Dr. Mallory last year,” Everstar admitted. “It was on her life and her work for the Burton Foundation. She authored the Sentinel Guide Protection Act when she was my age, you know.”

“I didn’t know she was that young,” Eddie said. “At any rate, I don’t have to work and could afford to pay for you and Carla out of pocket, if necessary, all the way through high school for Bea without suffering for it since Buck’s trust fund matured last year.” He took a deep breath. “But I can’t sit on my ass like that.”

“No, it would get really boring. I mean, I guess you could start filming TikTok trends. We can dance on the patio if you want.”

Eddie huffed a little. “Sure.” She laughed. “And I’ll speak to him about transferring into a Burton school. He said no last year, and I respected that without any sort of discussion because he likes the STEM options at Morgan. Still, things are different now, and I don’t know how many people at that school knew I was an online Guide at all. Now, everyone knows.” He waved a hand. “Why didn’t he come to me and ask? Do you know?”

“He doesn’t want to stress you out,” Everstar said and shrugged. “Honestly, Eddie, none of us want to stress you out because it makes it harder for you to keep your grief to yourself.”

He winced. “I’m sorry.”

“No, hey, no one can be on lockdown all the freaking time, and you’re more than entitled to your grief,” Everstar said. “I don’t know how you keep pushing through every single damn day.”

He’s basically spent the month after the ascension in bed, heartbroken and furious. “Well, you know I didn’t do well at the start.”

“Yeah, well, anyone that has a problem with that is toting a whole-ass asswhoopin’, per Thomas’ mother.” Everstar rubbed the back of her neck and yawned. “I should go.”

“You’ve been tired lately,” Eddie said. “Do you need some time off?”

“Julie’s got a new dude,” Everstar said sourly. “And all they do is bang. I get it—she uses sex to keep her empathy on an even keel. But it’s actually keeping me up despite the soundproofing because she leaks her emotions all over the place before, after, and during.”

“Then sleep here when he’s over,” Eddie said. “Seriously.”

She looked so relieved that he felt bad for not saying anything previously.

“Thanks.” She yawned again. “I’m going to go pass out then.”

“Okay, but you’re not on duty, so turn on all the buffers and let me handle the kids.”

“Sounds great,” Everstar agreed and dragged herself out of the kitchen.

Eddie checked the time and went to find his cell phone. It was still on the sofa where he’d thrown it, so he settled there and called Carla.

“Hello.”

“Carla, hey,” Eddie said. “Busy?”

“Just finished watching my show,” she said warmly.

Eddie honestly loved talking to Carla Price. He’d rarely encountered a fellow Guide so deeply comforting. He relaxed and exhaled slowly. “Do you think I need a conservator?”

“No, and I’d have told you already if I thought you did,” Carla said immediately. “Has something happened?”

“Christopher is trying to manage my stress for me and keeping secrets about things he really shouldn’t,” Eddie said, then explained the situation with the teacher.

Carla huffed a little. “She did seem surprised to meet me and checked my ID, of course. I’d have filed a complaint if she hadn’t done that part. It was certainly inappropriate for her to question Christopher about your finances. I can help you craft a complaint if you need.”

“Everstar thinks I should move him into the Burton program.”

“There are two different choices for his age group here,” Carla said. “I think he’d probably prefer the Burton School for the Sciences. The smaller academy ends with the fifth grade, but the science school goes all the way through high school. It’ll allow him to make a friend group that will be with him all the way through his senior year. We work best when we have a circle of trusted friends, as you already know.”

Eddie never had to prod Carla for advice, which he appreciated. In a lot of ways, she practically mothered him, but it wasn’t something they discussed and probably never would. Still, he appreciated and sometimes practically wallowed in her maternal affection. She gave it freely, so he didn’t feel guilty about taking it.

“Yeah, that’s probably the best choice. I think I need to spend some time with him one-on-one,” Eddie said. “I’ve not given him a lot of individual time lately, and I wonder if that’s part of the problem. I know he’s not jealous of Bea, and honestly, he clearly prefers her company to anyone else’s.”

“Well, they love each other a lot,” Carla said. “And they trust each other—she won’t ever hurt him on purpose, and he knows it. They have a little psionic connection of their own that’s not quite a tether. He’s very aware of her despite his lingering latency. Bea, in turn, is very in tune with his moods and emotions. There will come a time when that little girl will pick a fight with the whole world for Christopher.”

Eddie laughed because he could see it. “Yeah.”

“I’ll come get her in the morning—we’ll have a girl’s day, and you can spend some time with Christopher one-on-one,” Carla suggested.

“We already decided that you were going to be off tomorrow,” Eddie protested.

“Bea loves the spa,” Carla said blithely. “We’ll get massages and pedicures. Is Everstar busy?”

“Her best friend is turning twenty-one tomorrow, so it’s an all-day and night party,” Eddie said. “I suspect that she’ll sleep most of Monday, or at least she should. Also, I don’t know how you get Bea to sit still for a pedicure.”

“She loves it,” Carla said. “The spa we go to is run and staffed entirely by Guides. Last time, she even picked out her own color.”

It had been purple glitter. It had taken a lot of work on his part to get it off when it started to chip. So, he huffed a little. “Absolutely no more glitter.”

Carla laughed. “Okay.”

“Everstar is sleeping here tonight. Her roommate is a problem, so I was hoping you’d help her figure out a better solution.”

“What kind of problem?”

“The kind of problem that uses sex to keep herself empathically sated while she leaks her emotions all over Everstar in the process,” Eddie said. “We both know that’s bullshit, and I don’t know why she’s tolerating it.”

“They’ve been friends since elementary school,” Carla said. “I’ll figure out how to handle it. That apartment is officially Everstar’s on her own, so if the friend needs to be moved along, it’ll be done one way or another. She values the friendship, so I’ll make sure the solution doesn’t hurt that, if possible. But Julie knows better. She’s just being lazy because Everstar is her friend.”

“It’s borderline abusive,” Eddie said.

“Yes, I agree,” Carla murmured. “I’ll wade in and take care of it.”

Eddie nodded and put his feet up. “Thanks for the chicken and rice.”

“Christopher asked for it,” Carla said. “And it’s no problem. You have a pending grocery order on the iPad. I didn’t submit it since I didn’t know when you’d be there to accept the delivery. You’ll need to check for personal products since I didn’t invade your bathroom.”

Eddie laughed a little. “Yeah, okay. I was thinking I’d take Christopher to the Santa Monica pier tomorrow. Thoughts?”

“Well, he loves those silly games.”

* * * *

Cristobal trembled and came with a soft groan. Lou continued to move, one slow thrust after another, as he pressed against Cristobal’s back. The pleasure was intense and perfect. Lou groaned against his neck and stilled as he came. He pulled from his body and started to move away, but Cristobal caught his hand and pulled gently.

“Stay.”

“Of course,” Lou murmured and wrapped an arm around him. “Should I do more about the Beauregard situation?”

“Certainly,” Cristobal murmured. “It’s our duty to protect them, Lou. It’s the least of what I owe my boy. I hate that they used me against Eddie. It was the last thing he needed, and he doesn’t deserve the stress they’re putting him under with their selfish demands.”

“Tony is prepared to sanction the whole family on a national level if they continue to be a problem,” Lou said. “He’s furious that they hid the fact that Colton is close to dormant.”

“The prolapse isn’t new,” Cristobal said. “Once I allowed myself to actually scan him, it became clear that he’s damaged. I don’t know if he can bond at this point, but his family is not prepared to accept it right now. Hamilton Beauregard is clearly prepared to endanger his own relationship with the psionic plane to protect his son. I wish I didn’t understand that.”

“Don’t compare yourself to that asshole,” Lou muttered. “You would never seek to control another person to protect or shelter your son.”

Cristobal wasn’t so sure. “Out of all the things in this world, I never suspected that fatherhood would be the thing that destroyed me.” He huffed a little. “I never even wanted kids.”

Lou laughed.

“It’s not funny.”

“Oh, Cris, it is very funny. Before I ever met you, I was told that you were a package deal and that Evan Buckley was to be accepted and treated as your son.”

Cristobal took a deep breath. “I was worried that I’d have to choose between you, and I knew I’d have to reject you if you couldn’t tolerate Evan in my life.”

“It was evident from the very start that I’d nothing to worry about,” Lou murmured. “He saw you as a mentor and father figure. I want to make insane promises that I couldn’t possibly keep.”

“Grief is what it is,” Cristobal said. “And it’s hard to manage my own loss in the face of what Eddie lost. I can’t…I went unbonded for decades, and now I think even a day without you would be an unreasonable sacrifice on my part.”

“I feel the same,” Lou admitted. “And watching Eddie grieve all these months makes me feel ultimately selfish for bonding at all. I’d never want you to suffer that way, darling.”

“We are responsible to and for each other,” Cristobal said. “And I do not regret bonding with you. How could I? Coming to LA and meeting you filled my heart with so much love and joy. I was content in Peru, but I was not living the life I should. With you, I’m fulfilling my purpose, and the love you give me is priceless. But even if none of that were true, coming here healed Evan. It gave him the love of his life, and he allowed himself to build a family. Love is worth the pain it causes.”

“There was a time when I doubted it,” Lou murmured. “I’d never really had a relationship last, and even my marriage feels like a pale imitation of love when I compare it to what I have with you.”

“The Sentinel in you would’ve never been happily married to a mundane,” Cristobal murmured. “I know you never expected to come online, and that’s why you gave in and lived like a mundane.” He took a deep breath. “Is Eddie okay?”

“He talked with Carla for a while and wants to make some changes to Christopher’s school situation for a very good reason. You should ask him if he wants help with that,” Lou murmured. “Then he retired to his bedroom and turned on all of his privacy filters for the apartment. I’m not sure if it’s for Everstar or for himself.”

“Everstar is there?”

“Her roommate is a problem for her,” Lou said.

“The roommate is a problem for me, but I’ve been ignoring it since Everstar does so much for our family,” Cristobal muttered. “That girl’s lack of empathic discipline is really frustrating. I’ll speak with Carla, and we’ll get her moved to a different living accommodation.”

Lou moved then. “Come shower with me, and I’ll clean up the mess I made of you.”

“As well you should,” Cristobal said in an amused tone.

 

 

Chapter 3

Eddie snagged a napkin and wiped the ketchup off his son’s nose. Christopher just laughed and took another big bite of his hotdog. He was trying to figure out how to have the conversation with Christopher in such a way that it didn’t come back on Everstar. They had a good relationship that his son valued, and he didn’t want anything to mess that up.

“You’ve been worried lately,” Eddie said and put a bottle of water closer to Christopher, who took the hint and drank deeply. “I hope that you can talk to me about anything that’s bothering you.”

Christopher nodded.

“I know that I’ve been…off since the bombing,” Eddie said quietly, and Christopher’s shoulders bunched up. “And losing Buck has been difficult for all of us.”

“It hurts a lot,” Christopher said. “And I don’t know how it stops hurting as long as he’s gone. I think…I think love is too dangerous, Daddy.”

“Loving someone is a risk,” Eddie said. “But it’s worth it.”

“I don’t….” Christopher frowned and dug into his bag of chips.

“If we hadn’t met Buck, we’d have never met Bea,” Eddie said. “And she’s a gift to us, Mijo. If we never get him back, we at least have the child his heart chose at the moment when she needed him most.”

“I love Bea,” Christopher said wistfully. “It’s like she was meant to be my sister. I wouldn’t want to go back to not knowing her.” He huffed and looked away. “Can we get on the Ferris wheel?”

“Sure,” Eddie said. “Maybe let the food settle since you don’t want to get motion sick.”

“We can go out to the pier part,” Christopher said and pointed toward the long wood pier that stretched out over the water. “It’s nice here. We should’ve brought Bea.”

“She’s too little for the rides,” Eddie said. “And the crowd would be a lot without Carla to help me create a buffer for her.”

“I like Carla a lot.”

“She’s great,” Eddie said. “I wouldn’t know what to do without her.”

“How long will the Burton Foundation pay for her to help you with Bea?” Christopher questioned, mouth pressed into a thin line.

“She’s Bea’s conservator, and they’ll pay for her to act in that role until Bea no longer needs her help,” Eddie said. “Carla will even go to school with her.” He cleared his throat. “Speaking of school, I was thinking that you might like to go to the Burton School for Science instead of Morgan.”

His son frowned and took another big bite of his hot dog.

“I read about them this morning since I have to start thinking about preschool for Bea. She’ll have to go to one of the schools that the Burton Foundation has in the area because she’s online.”

“The science school?”

“Maybe. It would allow her to go to school at the same place all the way through high school,” Eddie said.

“I’m not online, though,” Christopher said.

Eddie considered that. “Christopher, there are less than fifty online children in the United States, and they all came online during very traumatic circumstances. Bea is the only online minor in the whole state of California under the age of sixteen.

“Oh.” Christopher frowned a little. “I should’ve asked.”

“Certainly,” Eddie said in amusement. “I’m sorry that wasn’t clear to you at the start.”

“It was really bad then when Bea was born,” Christopher said. “I knew her mom threw her away, but….”

“The details are horrible, and I don’t want to share them with you,” Eddie said quietly. “But she barely survived what was done to her, Christopher. If Buck hadn’t been there, she would’ve gone into psionic shock and died before the people rescuing her could’ve gotten her out of the pipe she was put in.”

Christopher’s eyes welled with tears. “I don’t want to imagine her like that.”

“Please don’t,” Eddie said gently. “I’m glad to have not been there.”

“Papa’s a good person,” Christopher said and shoved his fingers under his glasses to rub his eyes. “Is that why the psionic plane keeps him?”

The question was startling, and Eddie found he couldn’t discount it. “I don’t know, Mijo. Some people would say we shouldn’t question the plane and that the forces there aren’t for us to understand.”

“What do you think?”

Eddie thought that the psionic plane needed to give his love back to him, but that wasn’t something he felt comfortable saying to his son since Christopher was still struggling with his own grief.

“I was told when I was your age that nature provides,” Eddie said, and Christopher made a face. “What?”

“Nature ought to give my papa back,” Christopher muttered and finished off his hotdog. He chewed slowly, clearly irritated. “I can change schools.”

“Just like that?” Eddie questioned.

“The teachers at Morgan are nosy,” he said sourly. “And I should check out the Burton school situation before Bea goes. That way, we can put our foot down if the school isn’t good enough for her.”

Eddie grinned at him. “Let’s go enjoy the view for a bit, then we’ll tackle the Ferris wheel.”

“And the roller coaster.”

“I guess,” Eddie muttered, and Christopher laughed.

He cleaned up their table, and they walked down the boardwalk to the pier. It wasn’t crowded, and Christopher stopped to watch a man fishing briefly before they found a bench of their own to claim. Eddie took a deep breath as Christopher slouched down beside him.

“Do you miss being a firefighter?”

“Yeah,” Eddie said. “I do.” They’d passed a team from the Santa Monica Fire Department, so he figured seeing them had sparked his son’s interest. “But things are different, and I need to be home more.”

“Because of me?”

“There’s no one to blame,” Eddie said.

“I’m not having nightmares anymore,” Christopher said. “I hate that you don’t like your job.”

“I don’t dislike working in dispatch,” Eddie corrected. “It’s just not…what I’d prefer to be doing. The work is good, and I like my coworkers.”

“You worked as a firefighter before you bonded,” Christopher said. “How is it different now?”

“I miss him,” Eddie said quietly. “I can’t…sometimes, I turn and look for him, and he’s not there. It’s hard, and it would be harder on the job. I can’t afford that kind of distraction. I think it will get better, but for now, I’ll work in dispatch. I can still help protect the tribe by making sure other firefighters have the support they need.”

“Okay.” He frowned. “Is there somewhere we can file a complaint?”

“About what?” Eddie asked curiously.

“The psionic plane is being selfish, Daddy,” Christopher muttered. “Someone should tell it about itself.”

Eddie stared for a moment, then started to laugh. His son huffed dramatically and leaned into him as he giggled. He kissed the top of his son’s head and took a deep breath as he breathed in the scent of baby shampoo. Christopher had sensitive eyes, so they hadn’t graduated from baby products when it came to washing his hair.

“Does Bea feel okay?” Christopher questioned.

“She’s…feeling amused,” Eddie said. “And kind of sleepy. I outlawed glitter polish.”

Christopher laughed. “She likes to get her feet rubbed.”

The air shifted around them, and Eddie frowned as he looked for the source. His senses honed in, and he let his hearing spread out in a way he very rarely did. Something was off, but he didn’t know what it was.

“Something’s wrong,” Christopher said quietly.

Mars appeared in front of Eddie and began to prowl. People around them started to move away, and several made shocked little noises. The appearance of a spirit animal wasn’t uncommon, but a black jaguar was enough to give anyone pause. He hadn’t seen her since the night of the bombing. Eddie reached out for her, but Mars disappeared before he could connect with her.

Then, psionic energy swirled around in front of him. Buck appeared.

“Eddie.”

“Evan,” Eddie said hoarsely and stood.

His Sentinel reached out to him, and Eddie couldn’t help but do it in return. Nor could he keep the wounded sound he made to himself when his fingers went straight through Buck’s hand.

“Something is coming,” Buck said, and he looked over Eddie’s shoulder. “Oh, god, sweetheart. You have to run.”

Eddie snatched Christopher up and ran.

“Everyone run!” Buck shouted. “Tsunami!”

His Sentinel’s desperation bled all over him through their bond. He pushed back all the emotions that were coming at him as people started to run. Distantly, a siren started to sound, but it was obscenely late. He could hear the water coming, and it was going to be big.

“Papa!” Christopher screamed.

Eddie turned and stopped to stare in horror. Buck was standing in front of the wave, hands out, and psionic energy was pouring out around him. He was holding back the tsunami. People were stopping around Eddie to stare at the battle between man and nature.

“Get high!” Eddie shouted. “Climb!”

A man to his left ran down a short alley. “There’s a ladder to the roof!”

Eddie went to him and put Christopher down on the ground with shaking hands. “We need to pull it down.”

“I weigh more than you,” the man said and cupped his hands.

Eddie accepted the boost up, caught the bottom rung of the ladder, and it slid down because of his weight. He snagged Christopher, who was leaning against the wall, and started up the ladder.

“Keep them coming,” Eddie ordered. “But calm! Everyone stay calm!” Up on the roof, he sat Christopher down again. “Okay, I have to help people.”

“Okay,” Christopher said with a shaky nod.

Eddie went back to the ladder and pulled the first person over the ledge. Then he kept doing it. On the other side of the street, another operation similar to their own was going on. But most of the people from the pier were still running or going into buildings. He pulled up the guy who had helped him with the ladder and looked down the street. Buck was still standing exactly where he’d last seen him. Water was rushing over his feet, but most of the wave was being held by the psionic energy emanating out of Buck.

Then, a sound came to him that he worried he’d never hear again—his Sentinel’s heartbeat. Tears welled in Eddie’s eyes, and he took in a ragged, painful breath.

“I’m safe!” he shouted. “We’re safe!” He plucked Christopher up and kissed his cheek. “Tell him you’re safe, Mijo.”

“I’m safe, Papa!” Christopher shouted. “I’m safe!”

Buck didn’t move.

“I’m safe!” A woman shouted from the other rooftop.

Then, everyone around them started to do the same. Over a hundred people were spread out over the two buildings. And they were all shouting that they were safe. Buck turned and looked at Eddie then. Despite the distance, their gazes connected, and Eddie had never been more grateful for his ascendant status.

The energy around Buck faded, and the wave crashed, taking his Sentinel from him again.

He watched helplessly, fingers curling into Christopher’s clothes as the wave rushed down the street below them. The silence from the people behind him wasn’t a relief at all.

“Where’s Papa?” Christopher demanded.

Eddie held him tighter. “I don’t know.”

He kept looking, searching for any sign of his Sentinel. Then Buck surfaced, and Christopher’s breath caught.

“Go get him, Daddy,” Christopher said urgently. “He needs help.”

Eddie took a deep breath as he watched Buck start to swim toward a partially flooded-out fire truck. Leaving Christopher felt impossible.

“My name is Chad Rogers,” the younger man who’d helped him with the ladder said. “I’m a cadet at the LAFD fire academy. Feel free to scan me.” Eddie turned to him. “I swear on my life that absolutely nothing will happen to your son.”

Eddie felt nothing but sincere honesty from the man, so when he reached out for Christopher, he allowed Chad to take his son. Christopher went without any sort of complaint and looped an arm around the man’s neck, then Jarra appeared and barked sharply to let Eddie know she more than had the situation under control.

“Go get my papa,” Christopher ordered huffily, even as several people around them started talking about the little wolf Guide.

“Okay, Mijo.” He went to the side of the building, swung over the side, and went down the ladder as quickly as he could.

Once in the water, he headed for the fire truck. He crawled on top of it just as Buck caught hold of the side mirror. Eddie moved down the length of the truck, and for the first time in eight months, he grabbed Buck’s hand. He pulled Buck onto the truck, and the heavy weight of his Sentinel’s body was such a relief. He felt solid and real.

“Eddie.” Buck’s hands were urgent as they pulled Eddie close. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.”

Eddie just held onto him, heart aching as their bond adjusted to their new physical circumstances. They stayed where they were, bodies pressed close. He cupped the back of Buck’s head and took a deep breath.

“I’ve missed you so much,” Eddie confessed.

“Where’s Chris?” Buck questioned.

“On a roof, two buildings up the street. How are your senses?”

“Partially numb, but serviceable in the moment.” Buck let his forehead rest against Eddie’s. “I’ve missed you, too.”

Eddie pressed a soft kiss to Buck’s mouth, and he took a deep breath. “I can’t believe you held back a tsunami.”

“I promised you that I would keep our family safe,” Buck said quietly, and Eddie stared at him. “I think I might have actually tore a hole in the psionic plane, but I regret nothing.”

Eddie touched Buck’s face with trembling fingers. “You’ll stay.”

“I’ll never go anywhere without you ever again,” Buck promised quietly. “I swear it.”

Eddie took a deep breath and started to respond, but he heard screaming. They both turned and saw people in the water heading their way.

Buck moved first, going for the back of the truck. “Check the front—see if we can get to the radio.”

Eddie slid down the side of the truck and through the driver’s side window. The entire cab was flooded out, and the radio was underwater. He went into the back, found a paramedic’s bag, and grabbed it. As he exited, he saw that Buck was in the water—hauling the fire hose across the street.

The separation felt unreasonable, and that made him feel irrational, so he dropped the bag on top of the water pump then got to work.

* * * *

“First, I need you to sit,” Lou said as he guided Cristobal away from the crowd gathering in the conference room of their pride facility and into a private room.

“What?” Cristobal questioned. “Lou, we have a major disaster on our hands. I need to get out there and start organizing our people to help.”

“Cris, please,” Lou murmured and pulled the door shut. He carefully put a tablet in his Guide’s hand, then turned on all the buffers in the room using the panel by the door. “Natalie and Isla can handle it.”

Cristobal glanced toward the windows as they darkened. “What’s happened?”

“From all reports, I’ve gotten in the last ten minutes, neither Eddie nor Christopher were harmed.” He paused and took a deep breath. “But they were on the pier when the tsunami made landfall.”

“How…the fuck did they survive it?” Cristobal questioned as tears welled in his eyes. He couldn’t keep the horror at bay immediately and was glad for the room filters.

“They were the epicenter of the psionic field that initially held back the tsunami,” Lou said gently. “Darling, watch the video.”

Cristobal focused on the tablet and pushed play. The video was shaky, but it was clear that a man was standing between the person with the camera and the tsunami wave. For a moment, he stared in disbelief, then Evan turned and looked out in the distance, beyond the person who was filming. The wave crashed down on him.

“The audio is muted,” Lou murmured. “But people were shouting—telling him they were safe. The LAFD reports over a hundred people stranded on the top of two buildings just off the pier. SAR is already on the way to them, and so is the 118. Bobby Nash promised me he’d get his hands on our boy as soon as possible.”

“He’s…okay?”

“Watch the next video,” Lou said gently and changed the screen for his Guide when Cristobal hesitated.

Cristobal took a deep breath as he watched Evan in the water, swimming against the current—so strong and sure. Then the camera panned to Eddie on a flooded fire truck, reaching out for Evan and pulling him from the water. Psionic energy danced in the air around them as they held each other tight, then exchanged a tender kiss, and Cristobal closed his eyes even as tears streamed down his face.

“I have to go there—find a way, Lou. I don’t want to get in the way of rescue efforts or take up valuable resources better spent on helping anyone, but I need to see my son.”

Lou touched him carefully, cupping his face. “Consider it done.”

* * * *

“I hear boats,” Buck said as he helped a woman over onto the fire truck. “We’re going to need more than they’re bringing.”

“They have to know it,” Eddie said. “Chad said his phone call to dispatch connected, and he’s been updating them on our status. He’s doing a good job up there of keeping them organized and calm.”

Buck glanced toward the building where Christopher was. His son waved at him, and he was glad to see that his temporary guardian continued to take his duty very seriously. “We should make sure Bobby gets his name.”

“Yeah, agreed,” Eddie said as he guided their newest rescue to a spot to rest. “Okay, ma’am, the truck hasn’t moved in a while, but things can get bumpy, so please hold onto the railing and keep an eye on the water for large debris piles.”

“Thank you,” she said and wrapped one hand around the metal bar, her fingers whitened with strain. Then she glanced toward Buck, who was pulling another person from the water. “I’m so happy for you, Guide Diaz.”

Eddie blinked in surprise and stared at her for a moment, then nodded. “It’s been a day.”

She laughed a little. “Yeah, I can see that.”

There were several helicopters surveying the area, so when one started to hover over them, Eddie really didn’t think much of it. It was relieving when they started dropping rescue personnel on the buildings as he wasn’t sure about injuries and hadn’t let himself spend too much time evaluating them on any level.

The boats were on the same street with them a few minutes after the helicopter started working the area. He focused on his Sentinel as Buck climbed back onto the fire truck. They’d spread rescues across the truck and several other vehicles that were above the water line. It wasn’t ideal, but they were working with the bare minimum. He was glad the boats were coming since the situation was already beyond manageable for the two of them.

“You’re exhausted,” Eddie said and took Buck’s hand. “How do you feel?”

“I can barely feel your hand in mine,” Buck confessed. “I can’t smell anything at all, and I think hearing is going to go next.”

“Then you’re evacuating as soon as possible,” Eddie said, and it wasn’t relieving at all that Buck just nodded his agreement as his Sentinel would run himself into the ground in order to help others. “Take a break and sit. I’ll monitor the catch line until the boats get here.”

Buck took a deep breath but then nodded and sat down. He shrugged out of the long-sleeved shirt he was wearing and rubbed his arms a little. Eddie was frankly surprised and relieved that he’d not come back from ascension naked and clueless since, apparently, that was a thing the ancients did to people. He couldn’t ask questions now, but something about the way Buck returned and what he’d said about the psionic plane made him think the ancients hadn’t had a damn thing to do with his Sentinel’s return.

Eddie focused on the boats shortly after he pulled a teenager onto the truck. The boy was coughing a little, but his lungs were clear. So, he just held onto him until he was seated, then waved to Thomas.

Thomas Marshall was out of the boat and on the truck in seconds. He headed straight for Buck, and Eddie didn’t blame him. Thomas hadn’t dealt with the loss of Buck any better than Eddie had and had, in fact, spent nearly four weeks in seclusion at the estate property because of sensory spikes.

“Evan Buckley, you sorry motherfucker,” Thomas said and jerked Buck up off the truck and into a tight hug.

Buck just laughed a little and clung to his fellow Sentinel as several more boats arrived. Cosmo climbed up onto the truck and stared at Buck briefly before focusing on Eddie. “It’s all over the Internet—both him holding back the wave and you pulling him out of the water afterward. Cristobal is at an abandoned VA facility about two miles from here where we’ve put together a field hospital.”

“I promised him that I’d bring his son to him as soon as possible,” Bobby Nash said from the boat. “And where is your son?”

“Two buildings down on a roof,” Eddie said and pointed toward the building. “I have a cadet firefighter up there keeping an eye on him and organizing with dispatch over his cell phone.”

“Rogers, right?” Nash said. “He’s impressed some people with the way he’s handling the pressure—out here with the two of you.”

Eddie offered Bobby a hand and pulled him onto the truck. “He’s young, but he’s holding the line and handling everything better than I could ask for.”

“Well, if the two of you want me to hire you a probie, I expect you both to be back on the job to supervise him,” Bobby said, and Eddie just grinned. His captain patted him on the shoulder then walked down the length of the truck. “Let him go, Thomas. It’s my turn.”

“Bobby, hey,” Buck said with a warm smile, and the older man huffed before pulling him into a hug.

“You little asshole,” Bobby muttered, and Eddie just shook his head.

Buck let himself get sorted into a boat only after it was confirmed they were going to go retrieve Christopher. Eddie went up the ladder personally to get their son and brought him down after he’d had a talk with Rogers about how the evacuation would be handled. There were a dozen more boats heading their way, so being able to relay that to everyone on the roof had helped.

“Papa!” Christopher practically launched himself at Buck and was caught easily.

“Hey, Superman,” Buck said against his hair even as their son burst into tears. “I’m so sorry.”

Eddie settled down in the boat with them and wrapped an arm around Christopher. His son was clearly overwhelmed and maybe had been the whole time. It was like a dam of emotion had broken loose in him. The trip to the field hospital was quiet in the wake of Christopher’s crying, and Eddie was grateful for that because his own emotions were all over the place.

* * * *

Cristobal had allowed himself to be placed in a room as he didn’t want his reunion with his son to be in public because it would end up on the fucking Internet. There was no hope of taking down what was already posted, and IOA had already contacted him asking for access to Evan. He’d forwarded the request to Rampart and asked him to make it go away.

A mundane woman named Elizabeth Weir was the committee head of the International Oversight Advisory board that coordinated stargate operations for the UN, and she was mercenary as fuck. Cristobal appreciated the way she took care of her business and protected the world from exterior threats within the mandate of the organization she led, but that didn’t equal patience on the subject of his son.

The door opened, and Lou held it as Evan entered carrying Christopher. The boy was clinging to Evan in such a way that Cristobal didn’t have to assess him empathically to understand he’d reached a point of emotional saturation.

“Dad,” Buck said quietly, and Christopher shifted in his arms then reached out for Eddie. “It’s okay, Superman.”

“It’s Lito’s turn,” Christopher said and buried his face against Eddie’s neck as soon as his father took him.

Cristobal cupped Buck’s face. “I’ve been so worried about you.”

“I know. I’m sorry,” Buck said quietly. “I felt you searching, but the plane wouldn’t let me talk to you.”

“I’m surprised the ancients let you return to interfere, considering their policies,” he said quietly.

“Well,” Buck said and shrugged. “I didn’t give anyone a choice, and the ancients made a mistake a few weeks ago.” He glanced toward Christopher, who was staring at him. “Let’s talk about all of that later. I need…. My senses are collapsing, and I’d really like to hold my baby before they all go.”

Cristobal frowned and stared for a long moment. He couldn’t help but reach out empathically. His son felt distressed, but not to a degree that would equal an immense problem. “You aren’t falling into prolapse.”

“No, I think…. I just need to sort of reset and put myself back together empathically. Where’s my Bea?”

“Bea’s at the estate,” Lou said quietly and cupped Buck’s shoulder gently as Cristobal drew Evan in for a hug. “Carla and Everstar have both retreated to the estate due to the viral nature of the video.”

“What video?” Buck questioned and looked between them.

“Someone recorded you holding back the wave,” Eddie said roughly. “And me pulling you out of the water.”

“That’s so rude and intrusive,” Christopher muttered. “And stupid—what kind of person stops running from tsunami to make a freaking TikTok?”

“The same kind of idiot that would pull over on the side of the road and film a tornado,” Eddie retorted, and Buck sighed.

Cristobal agreed with his son-in-law. Whoever had done it was an idiot to risk their lives to get the footage of the wave being held back and an asshole for posting footage of their reunion. It had been a very personal and intimate moment that the world hadn’t needed to see.

* * * *

He’d ended up in the back of Lou’s SUV, tucked between Eddie and Christopher. Buck rarely found himself in such a position as they normally put the kids between them in vehicles if they road in the backseat. The trip to the estate facility was nearly thirty minutes on a good day, and very little about the day was good, not even on the traffic front.

Eddie spent the entire trip working on their shields and gently trying to prod his senses into a state of normal, and Buck appreciated the effort. He relaxed by degrees, content in his Guide’s care. Christopher was pressed as close as his seatbelt would allow and had one hand fisted in Buck’s T-shirt.

When he’d been ascended, Buck had done his best to avoid fixating on the grief his absence was causing his family as it made him so furious he couldn’t think. Figuring out a way to come home had become his main focus, and Oma had helped as much as she could. In the end, she’d defended his efforts until the bitter end. He owed her so much and couldn’t help but wonder where she’d landed after everything was said and done.

“I need to speak with someone at the SGC,” Buck blurted out. “Probably Daniel Jackson.”

“I’ll handle it,” Lou said from the driver’s seat. “He’s certainly already heading this way. We thought, if we got you back, you’d be tossed on some planet somewhere in the galaxy with no memories at all like he was.”

“The ancients are dicks,” Buck muttered. “And they tried that a few times with me, but the psionic plane wouldn’t allow it. The last time they tried, it was a group effort, and they were essentially punished by the plane en masse.”

“What does that mean?” Eddie questioned.

“That there is a planet with a bunch of deascended ancients in Pegasus who have no idea who they are or where they come from,” Buck said with a shrug. “They have no stargate and were lucky the guardian of the plane bothered to clothe them before kicking them out.”

Cristobal turned to stare at him. “What?”

“Yeah,” Buck said. “It was pretty intense. In the end, there were only two of us left on the plane, and she helped me do what I did today. Even then, I had to strike a deal with the guardian to eventually return.”

“How long is eventually?” Eddie demanded.

“I get to grow old,” Buck said gently and squeezed Eddie’s hand. “And I can bring you with me.”

“Why?” Eddie questioned.

“The current guardian is tired and wants to be replaced,” Buck explained. “She’s been searching for a very long time. She thought Daniel Jackson would be the one, but he proved to be too ridged spiritually.”

“What about me and Bea?” Christopher questioned.

“We’ll have a very long conversation about that, Superman,” Buck said. “Our kind are meant to live here on Earth over and over again. If you ascended, then you’d be leaving the soul that is your Sentinel behind for eternity.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t want to do that,” Christopher said. “But I want to be with you and Daddy, Papa.”

“Well, I never left you—this whole time,” Buck said gently. “And, for the record, I agree, Clark Kent is a much better secret identity than Bruce Wayne. How did anyone not realize how expensive it was to be Batman? Who else could’ve afforded it in Gotham?”

Christopher laughed. “Denny has such crazy opinions.”

Just passing through the gates of the estate was relieving, and Buck hadn’t realized how unsafe he felt until that moment. He scratched his neck briefly, and Christopher pulled his hand down.

“Don’t scratch, Papa,” Christopher said. “It’s bad for you.”

“Bossy,” Buck muttered, and the boy laughed. He’d missed the laughter, and despite his fading hearing, it was a lovely sound.

Carla was out in front, standing on the wide veranda that spread out next to the large driveway, when they pulled up. Bea was bouncing a little in her arms, her gaze focused on the SUV. Eddie exited and carefully pulled Buck with him.

“I’ll get Chris,” he said, and Buck just nodded.

By the time he was up the small set of stairs, Carla had crossed the veranda, and Bea was making the sweetest, most delightful noise he’d ever heard.

“My sweet Bea, look at you,” Buck said as he took his daughter. He took a deep breath against her curls and shuddered. His sense of smell was a state of flux, which was better than completely numb as it had been during the tsunami. “You’ve changed so much.” He focused on Carla, who was crying. “Hey.” He brought her in for a side hug. “I’m sorry.”

“None of that,” she whispered and pressed her face briefly against his arm, then cleared her throat. “I’m so glad you’re back.”

“Papa.” Bea’s fingers clenched on his salt-crusted skin. “Papa.”

He watched tears well in her eyes, but Buck felt nothing but happiness radiating off of her. “It’s okay, baby.”

Bea’s mouth trembled, and she slouched against him, then buried her face against his chest. “Papa.”

Eddie put a hand on his back. “Let’s go inside. The sooner we can get you settled, the sooner the kids will calm down in response.”

“I’m fine,” Christopher protested.

“You’re a hot mess,” Cristobal said, and Christopher huffed dramatically.

They were taken to the back of the large house and put in an isolation suite much like the one he’d used the day Bea was born, but it was clearly designed for a family. Everstar was waiting for them with a few bags and a set of crutches, which Christopher was clearly happy to get.

Buck dragged her into a hug since she looked like she might cry, too. Of course, she promptly burst into tears the moment he did it, and Buck just sighed.

Shortly, he was put on a sofa despite his protests about his filthy clothes, and Christopher slouched down beside him as Bea clung in a fashion that told him cleaning up was going to be a long time coming. Eddie joined them, and Buck offered him a hand, which was taken immediately.

The shower would wait.

 

 

Chapter 4

The shower shouldn’t have waited. His skin felt awful, but Buck really didn’t regret spending several hours holding his kids. He was also relieved that his sense of touch was back to his version of normal. Eddie’s hands were careful and thorough as they glided over his irritated skin. His vision was back to normal, but he’d inadvertently pushed his hearing into a hyper range when the kids had been put to bed. He’d had a sensory spike for the first time in years, and it had been as startling as it had been painful.

“Easy,” Eddie murmured, and Buck just nodded as he let his head fall forward. “I have some crème to put on your skin after this that will help. The SGC put it out shortly after declassification, and it’s honestly kind of a miracle product.”

“From the tollan,” Buck said. “I checked it out thoroughly and even watched meetings with the FDA to make sure it was safe. No one cut any corners. It’s been in the approval process for years.”

“Good,” Eddie said. “I trust the people running the SGC, but it’s good to know that you provided a bit of oversight on that front.”

“On every front,” Buck said. “And the guardian will be more proactive going forward due to my influence. It wasn’t intentional, but she came to understand that I required a certain sort of standard going forward, and adhering to it made it easier for me to accept the deal.” He paused. “I’m sorry that I made that decision without you. If you can’t…do it, then that’s fine.”

“I’ll never leave your side,” Eddie said. “And wherever you go, I will follow.” He pressed a soft kiss against Buck’s shoulder. “I mean that. I had every single intention of ascending so I could join you, Buck.”

“I watched that meeting yesterday.” He paused. “Saturday—whenever that was.”

Eddie laughed. “It’s Monday. Is Colton a problem?”

“I don’t know,” Buck said shortly. “But, he went completely dormant before that plane landed in El Paso.”

“Did you ask the plane….”

“Of course I did,” Buck said. “That asshole came at you and considered our babies a problem. It was already retreating from him because of his lack of ethics, and it wasn’t bothered to finish that process abruptly. It probably felt like he got backhanded by the universe, but I don’t give a fuck.”

“What is the guardian?” Eddie questioned.

“I don’t know,” Buck admitted frankly. “Maybe a very old Sentinel or Guide, who achieved psionic harmony and saw a need within the plane. It needs governance and guidance across the board and not just because of the way the genetic legacy of our kind has spread. Sentinels and Guides have emerged on other planets in this galaxy, and they were killed by the goa’uld as soon as they were discovered. The guardian did nothing because of the alterans influence. It was lonely, and that’s why it allowed their ascension to begin with.”

“That’s…disgusting,” Eddie admitted. “It’s like they corrupted something sacred.”

“It is exactly like that,” Buck agreed. “Regardless, the guardian is ready to move on to whatever comes next for her, and unless something fundamental changes in about sixty years, I’m that replacement.” He paused. “We’re the replacement.”

“It’s an astounding and overwhelming mission to undertake,” Eddie said quietly. “But given a choice between death and psionic harmony—I’d pick harmony regardless of the duties attached. It will give us the chance to watch over our family for generations. We can protect our kind all over this galaxy and bring them home, if necessary.”

Buck nodded and turned around. Eddie’s hand slid over his hips and pressed him against the tile. He stroked his fingers down the side of Eddie’s face and smiled. “I hope you aren’t super attached to this beard, no matter how great you look with it.”

“I’m not,” Eddie assured. “Your skin is much too sensitive for me to keep it, at any rate, and I don’t want to give you beard burn. I just…the first month was hard, and I did the bare minimum. I felt like a shit parent that whole time, too, since the kids were suffering, and I could barely function. Cristobal and Lou practically lived with me after I left the estate and returned to the condo.”

“I can’t make up for this,” Buck said sadly. “Ever.”

“You saved my life,” Eddie said. “And the lives of more than a dozen others on that scene, Evan. You don’t need to make up for anything, nor do you owe me an apology. You sacrificed yourself for me and sought a higher plane of existence to do it. You are awe-inspiring. I was devastated, but also, I was and still am immensely proud of the very good man you are.”

Buck blinked back tears. “Eddie.”

“Then…God, you did it again yesterday. You set yourself against a life-destroying tsunami and saved the lives of thousands. You know that, right? You held that thing back from the entire bay for nearly five minutes and gave people a chance to run that the sirens didn’t give. If you hadn’t, the death toll would’ve been over 14,000 yesterday in Santa Monica. Instead, they’re estimating less than 500. We won’t have real numbers for a while, but you were amazing.”

“I wish I could’ve kept it from hitting at all,” Buck murmured. “I poured every single bit of power I had into it, and I think Oma did, too.”

“Who’s Oma?”

“An alteran woman I met on the plane. She was the only one to take my side and fought against the others when they tried to force me out. They intended to strip me of my memory and my abilities as a Sentinel permanently.”

“What the fuck?” Eddie demanded.

“So, now they’re in mortal bodies on a planet in Pegasus with no memories of who or what they are. They’ll never remember what they once there because the memories weren’t suppressed—they were removed. The guardian gave them basic skills, and that’s it. They won’t be allowed to ascend again.” Buck let his head fall back against the tile as Eddie started to wash his chest. “It was awful.”

“I can see how it would be,” Eddie murmured. “It was a form of genocide.”

“Yes,” Buck agreed. “But I don’t feel sorry for them at all. They were intruders on the plane. I’d have never allowed them to stay once I became the guardian.”

“Is that why they tried to do what they did?” Eddie questioned.

“They knew I found them intolerable, and when the guardian revealed herself, they were appalled to realize that they had no ability to fight or contain her. All along, the alterans believed themselves special and all-powerful in their ascended state. The guardian disabused them of that notion quickly.”

“What will you tell the SGC?”

“Very little about the guardian or my future role; it’s no one’s business but ours,” Buck said. “Oma agrees with that.”

“Where is she? Is she on the plane alone?”

“No, she seemed to have sacrificed her power to me when I held back the tsunami,” Buck said quietly. “I hope the guardian took care with her because she was the only good alteran I met.”

“So, she deascended as well,” Eddie said. “Hopefully, here on Earth. You don’t think the guardian put her with the rest of her kind, right?”

Buck huffed. “If they did, I’m going to make the SGC go get her because that would be bullshit.”

“How is your touch sense coming along?”

“Almost entirely back to normal,” Buck murmured.

“How does this feel?” Eddie questioned and wrapped a hand around his half-hard cock.

“Good, but not great like it should.” He closed his eyes and actively sought the pleasure he should be feeling. But it ebbed away, and he lost his erection rapidly.

“It’s okay,” Eddie murmured and released him. “You know it’s temporary.”

Impotence at any age would be demoralizing, but he wasn’t even thirty. Buck huffed a little and exhaled slowly. “I know.”

They finished up the shower slowly, taking their time because it felt necessary, and their seclusion period would last as long as they needed.

The beard issue came up again when they were drying off in the form of Buck asking if they had supplies for shaving. Because Everstar had packed for him, Eddie wasn’t sure. So, he went to the two bags that he’d been told were for them and found she had included a shaving kit and a new tube of Sentinel-safe lube. Eddie just laughed a little as he dropped the lube on the nightstand, took the shaving kit to the bathroom, and set everything out so he could trim it up first.

“Let me,” Buck said and plucked the scissors from Eddie’s hand.

What he hadn’t told anyone, and probably never would, was that the last time he’d shaved—Buck had done it. The most he’d done since Buck’s ascension was keep it trimmed so he didn’t end up looking like an extra in some Peter Jackson production.

Eddie couldn’t keep his hands to himself, so he finally let one hand settle on Buck’s hip just to find some sensory ground of his own. He didn’t remember how the shaving thing even started, but one morning, after a grueling shift, Buck had just taken over in the middle of Eddie shaving. He’d had hair removal when he’d first come online as a Guide, except for his face and head. But then, it wasn’t exactly common for men to permanently remove their facial hair in the US.

Buck had gotten everything but his head hair removed in Peru, where he’d been pampered and treated like a prince at a spa for an entire month after he’d come online. Eddie figured in those circumstances, he’d have probably done the same. Also, the laser removal process the Army had offered hadn’t been pleasant or any sort of luxury.

There was something soothing about the way Buck took on a task, and having his Sentinel entire focus was never a negative experience. The glide of the straight razor should’ve felt a bit threatening, but Buck had never, ever cut him. The Sentinel-safe shaving cream felt pleasant but was odorless. He’d smooth on some tollan crème afterward to ensure no issues.

“There,” Buck murmured. “I’ve missed your face like crazy.”

“I’ve missed yours, too,” Eddie said and moved to rinse his skin. Buck handed him a towel, and he patted dry. “It’s kind of weird for it to be gone.”

“I’m sorry that keeping it would be problematic because you did look great with it,” Buck said.

Eddie grinned. “Well, I know I look good without it, too. And I couldn’t keep it that full and go back into the field, which I’d frankly like to do as soon as possible.”

Buck sighed. “Your pretty face has been leading me astray since the day I set eyes on you. It was awful.”

“Let’s get some sleep. The kids won’t sleep as long as they should, considering how empathically saturated Chris is. I expect him to have nightmares, and we’ll need to do some heavy meditation sessions to even him out.”

Buck frowned and averted his gaze.

“Hey.” Eddie took his hand. “What is it?”

“Part of me wanted to just pluck you both up and take you away from it. But I couldn’t leave all those other people to die, Eddie.” He took a deep breath. “He probably saw people dead in the water, right?”

“Yeah, he did, and that’s…well. Look, it’s not fine, but I’d have never wanted you to make that kind of choice for me or him. Life is hard, and Christopher knows that. He saw some difficult things, but he also saw people stepping up and doing the right thing for each other. He saw you come back to us in a way that felt really concrete and permanent to him. Situations like yesterday bring out the best and worst in people—he saw the best of everyone around him. He saw the best of us, and that’s…exactly what I want our son to bring with him from this situation.”

“I just didn’t protect anyone out there as much as I wish I could’ve.”

“You did more yesterday than anyone could’ve asked for, Evan,” Eddie said. “You, in fact, did something nearly everyone would’ve considered impossible. And you came back to me and, querido, that’s all I would’ve ever asked of you.” He tugged gently on his hand. “Come to bed.”

* * * *

Cristobal wasn’t particularly interested in taking a phone call from Ramon Diaz, but the man was probably very concerned about his son and grandson. He understood that concern and couldn’t ignore him. He’d have never agreed to speak with Helena Diaz, and that was made clear to them months after Eddie and Evan had bonded. The woman wasn’t welcome to speak to him for the rest of her life.

A tone sounded as the call was transferred to his cell phone. “This is Dr. Salas.” He leaned against Lou as he put the call on speaker.

“Thank you for agreeing to speak with me, Dr. Salas. I know things haven’t always been civil between my family and yours.”

Cristobal raised an eyebrow at the phrasing but decided against addressing the assumption. “Eddie and Christopher are fine. They’re both at the estate property owned by the Burton Foundation in LA. Security is tight there. But there have been no issues on that front so far. Most people know better than to crowd a Sentinel; my son would be no exception despite the fact that he’s generally known to be quite good-natured.”

“I saw the video,” Ramon said. “Your son…. I’m glad you have your son back, Dr. Salas. I’m more relieved for Eddie, of course, as I would not want him to suffer alone the rest of his life the way he intended. I don’t know how to ask this of my mother without causing hurt feelings, so I decided to ask you.”

“Go ahead,” Cristobal said with a frown.

“Is Eddie’s attachment to his Sentinel normal? If it’s not—can it be mitigated? I don’t quite understand his devotion to Buck even when they were so definitively separated, and I wonder how it would be if one of them were killed.”

Cristobal sat up abruptly. “One of them or Evan, specifically? Have you heard something that makes you worry about his life, Ramon?”

“I, no, of course not. I would report such a thing. I know you don’t think much of me, Dr. Salas, but be assured I would never betray my own morals that way. I’m a man of faith, and God placed Sentinels among us as a gift. I’ve always believed this. Knowing what we know now about the universe, it is even more clear to me that they are here to protect us from threats larger than we’d ever thought possible. I just worry about my son and his grief. He was brought so low. Would you want your own son to suffer in such a way?”

“I wouldn’t want either of them to suffer in such a way again,” Cristobal said roughly. “But they fell in love, Mr. Diaz and such a thing cannot be mitigated. Don’t you remember what it was like to love with such fierce resolve and passion?”

“No, I can’t say that I do or ever have had that kind of love,” Ramon admitted.

Cristobal rarely bothered to pity Ramon for his circumstances as he was convinced the man had made the mess of his life and deserved to suffer in it. He frowned and shared a glance with Lou, who looked appalled.

“I can have Eddie call you once he comes out of seclusion.”

“No, I…. Let him be with his family. They need him far more than I do,” Ramon said. “Thank you for your time, Dr. Salas.”

The man hung up before Cristobal could respond, so he made sure the call terminated on his end and set aside the phone. “I’ve rarely interacted with dormant individuals,” he said quietly. “They avoid our communities for better or worse.”

“The trauma dormant need us even if they don’t want to admit it,” Lou said. “And ones like Ramon Diaz are a different breed. Isabel told me that Ramon idolized his father and took his bitterness to heart. If her husband had been treated for his childhood psionic injuries instead of discarded, then things would be very different for that family.”

Cristobal checked his watch. “What was the ETA on Isabel and Jetta’s flight?”

“They’re due to land in three hours,” Lou murmured against Cristobal’s hair. “But air traffic is crazy at LAX with relief workers coming in from several directions. FEMA is on the ground in force as of six hours ago, per Natalie. I’ll be notified if their flight is diverted.”

Cristobal nodded. “Was I wrong to allow that Beauregards to come here?”

“No, bonded to your son or not, Eddie is allowed to make his own decisions,” Lou said mildly.

“That’s not…I would never seek to take a decision from either of them. I’m just not sure I did a good job of protecting a member of our pride with that meeting. He went through with it to protect me, and shouldn’t it be the other way around? For more than one reason.”

“Letting the situation fester wouldn’t have served anyone. Of course, waiting just a day would’ve made any discussion twice as meaningless as the one we actually had. Hamilton Beauregard would’ve never been so arrogant to come here if Buck hadn’t been ascended.”

“I think he’s plenty arrogant enough,” Cristobal muttered. “And desperate to protect his son. Also, I think he’s the sort to seek retribution, so I wasn’t surprised to find out that he’d threatened to throw Eddie’s parents out of El Paso, no matter how illegal that would be. He doesn’t have that kind of authority without the backing of the regional primes.”

“And they aren’t going to give it under the circumstances. Neither Ramon nor Helena represent any sort of threat to the Beauregard family or any member of their pride. Getting bent because his son was rejected is immature, selfish, and cause for removal, in my opinion. I’ve expressed that concern to both the regional primes and to Rampart.”

* * * *

Buck lifted Bea out of the portable crib, and she slouched against his chest with a little huffy noise, then tucked her face against his neck.

“Is she okay?” Cristobal asked from the doorway.

Buck nodded. “Yeah, just awake, and I couldn’t…. Well, she’s awake, so I came in here and to hold her.” He breathed deeply against her hair. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For taking care of them when I was gone,” Buck said and focused on Cristobal, who looked startled. “I knew you would, but seeing it in practice was a special kind of relief in circumstances that often left me so furious I didn’t know how I continued to exist.”

“Did you want to talk about that?”

“Yeah, but not without Eddie,” Buck said. “I’d rather not speak of it repeatedly.”

Cristobal nodded. “Okay.” He leaned on the doorframe. “Isabel and Jetta are on their way. They were in Peru.”

“I know,” Buck said. “I mean, I knew where they were.” He cleared his throat. “I couldn’t help but keep track of you all while I was ascended. Knowing you were safe was important.”

“How did you know about the tsunami?”

“I didn’t,” Buck said. “I just knew on a fundamental level that Eddie and Christopher were in mortal danger. The spirit animals on the plane were agitated, and the guardian released me. She let me go, and I knew it was life or death. When I appeared in front of them, I hoped it meant the guardian was going to deascend me. But she didn’t, and I was confused. Then I saw the wave, and I realized that I needed the power ascension had given me to save them.”

“You saved many thousands of people,” Cristobal said. “The governor wants to give you a medal.”

Buck huffed. “No.”

“I’ll tell him.”

“Good,” Buck murmured and swayed gently as Bea made a little noise and fisted both of her hands in his T-shirt. “She’s grown so much.”

“I’m sorry for what you missed,” Cristobal said. “Observation can’t replace living in a moment.”

“Agreed,” Buck said and cleared his throat. “Who else is here?”

“Rampart and DiNozzo beamed in with the General Sheppard and Dr. McKay from the SGC. O’Neill and Jackson will arrive in the morning. They have a situation in Colorado that they didn’t want to discuss in detail.”

Buck wondered if that was about Oma, and he hoped so. Not knowing where she was and what had happened to her was irritating him on an instinctual level. Since he understood that, on some level, he considered her pride, Buck knew he wouldn’t be comfortable until he was sure of her circumstances.

“There was a creature on the plane,” Buck said quietly.

“What?” Cristobal questioned.

“A creature—a mistake was made, and a goa’uld was allowed to partially ascend,” Buck explained and focused on his dad. He found the older man staring at him in horror. “He couldn’t be forced back entirely onto the physical plane. So, he existed in both places. The power he could use was immense, and Oma, the alteran who helped me, decided she had no choice but to keep him occupied for eternity. When I ascended, I came upon their fight and realized that they were basically equal in power. She needed help.”

“So, you helped her,” Cristobal said.

“Of course I did.” Buck cleared his throat. “We tore him to pieces, and the guardian tossed the pieces away—out of the plane. Oma followed and made sure the creature was completely destroyed. Then she dedicated herself to helping me because the fight was torture, and none of her own kind ever bothered to help her at all. They didn’t even try.”

“I see.”

“The alterans are awful,” Buck said. “Selfish, greedy, and amoral—it was disgusting to be near them. She was a shining light amongst them in comparison, and they disapproved of her at practically every turn. But the plane adores her, so they couldn’t act against her.”

“I’m surprised this guardian didn’t ask her to take its place,” Cristobal said mildly.

“She’s not…one of us,” Buck said finally. “And in the end, she was an intruder just as much as the others. The alterans never belonged on the psionic plane, and their presence was disruptive even if they did nothing.”

He focused on Bea, who had gone back to sleep. Buck considered putting her back in the crib but then walked over to the window with her instead.

“You’re ill at ease,” Cristobal said. “Can I help?”

“I just need to adjust,” Buck murmured. “My senses are back to normal, but my mind is racing.”

“Dr. Jackson said that ascension opened his mind up to a lot of information and that he lost it all when he was returned to a mortal body.”

“That information came from the alterans,” Buck said. “They brought Dr. Jackson into their collective consciousness so they could control and keep track of him. It was how they enforced their rules. The plane didn’t allow them to do that to me. It sheltered me from their influence and their control.”

“But still held you hostage,” Cristobal said.

“The guardian did,” Buck said. “And there is a difference, Dad.”

“What do you mean?”

“The guardian and the psionic plane exist as separate entities. She protects the plane from external influence as much as she can and guides the energy in a way that best serves our kind. But it’s a very delicate sort of dance, and the guardian is exhausted. She’d have moved on if she could’ve thousands of years ago.”

“Does the psionic plane really need her, or did she merely create a job for herself that shouldn’t exist?” Cristobal questioned.

“Our kind would’ve gone extinct if not for the guardian,” Buck said frankly, and Cristobal took in a ragged breath. “As for the plane, it’s like a child—innocent, eager to embrace us all, and it believes the best of every single one of us.”

“And you’ve agreed to take that duty for yourself,” Cristobal said.

“Eventually,” Buck murmured and rubbed Bea’s back when she stirred. “I’ll be a very old man when it happens. I was promised every single minute of my mortal life that I’ve been given.” He focused on his dad and found the older man looking relieved. “I wasn’t going to survive the ladder truck bombing.”

“What?”

“I was going to die. The guardian saw it and sent my spirit animal to facilitate my ascension because I was chosen before I ever came online to take her place,” Buck said quietly. “So, in a way, I’m living on borrowed time for the next sixty or so years.”

* * * *

Eddie shifted under the blanket and pulled Buck close as soon as he slid back onto the bed. “She normally goes back to sleep by herself.”

“I know,” Buck said. “I won’t do it often. It’ll give her bad habits. I just wanted to hold her.”

“You can hold our baby anytime she’ll allow it,” Eddie murmured against Buck’s skin. “She’s very independent, though, and would rather run than walk.”

“Yeah, I think I knew that was going to be the case from practically day one.” Buck cupped the back of Eddie’s head and exhaled slowly. “Go back to sleep.”

“I’m worried that I’ll wake up, and it will have all been a terrible, wonderful dream,” Eddie said and nuzzled against Buck’s throat. “How do you feel?”

“Evened out,” Buck murmured and eased him on his back.

Eddie hummed under his breath and relaxed under Buck with a smile. “Then you should get me off.”

“That’s the plan,” Buck said and sought a kiss.

The heavy weight of his Sentinel pressing him into the mattress was such a relief that Eddie couldn’t really articulate it. A small part of him had believed it would never happen, and they wouldn’t be reunited for decades. He’d prepared himself for it despite his determination to get Buck back one way or another.

After several soft and sweet kisses, he grabbed the back of Buck’s head and changed the tone because Eddie wanted to get his brains fucked out and knew exactly how to get his lover into that head space. Buck groaned, and he gripped Eddie’s hip with one hand while the other went searching for the lube on the nightstand.

Buck broke the kiss with a soft gasp. “Going to be demanding, I see.”

“You got a problem with that?”

Buck grinned and flicked open the lube. “If that’s how you want this to go—then that’s exactly how it will go.”

He slid down and sucked Eddie’s cock into his mouth eagerly. Eddie hooked a leg over Buck’s broad shoulder and curled his fingers into his hair. He adored the way Buck’s lips and tongue glided against his skin and couldn’t help but tug a little on his Sentinel’s hair. He was rewarded with a soft groan.

Eddie eagerly rocked into Buck’s fingers when they were pressed against his asshole and shuddered at the invasion. “Fuck yes.”

“Look at you, sweetheart,” Buck murmured as he lifted his head. “I’ve missed this so much.”

“So have I,” Eddie admitted and let one hand fall to Buck’s shoulder as he spread his legs. “Give me more.”

Buck added a third finger and pressed deeply into him repeatedly. He watched intently as Eddie rocked on his fingers and inhaled slowly as he did so. The moment stretched between them, and his breath caught as he watched his Sentinel stare at him. He adored the intensity and the attention more than he was willing to admit.

He huffed a little when Buck grinned at him. “Like what you see?”

“A lot,” Buck murmured. “You’re beautiful. I love you so much, Eds.”

Eddie bit down on his bottom lip and wrapped a hand around his cock. “You need to fuck me before I take care of myself.”

Buck pulled his fingers free, nudged Eddie’s hand away from his dick, and crawled over him. “Threatening me already? I’ve barely been back a day.”

“I’m just keeping you on your toes,” Eddie said in amusement and cupped the back of Buck’s head as he spread his legs deeply and put his feet flat on the bed.

Buck pushed into him with a soft, relieved groan and pressed their mouths together in a fierce kiss. They started to move, and Eddie braced his feet to give himself as much leverage as he could. The pleasure of being full was so good that Eddie could barely breathe.

The thrust of a cock in his body was bordering on overwhelming, and he couldn’t get enough. Buck buried his face against Eddie’s neck and shuddered, so Eddie wrapped his arms and legs around him. There was such comfort in the weight of his lover on him, and the pleasure increased with each grind of their bodies together.

“Come for me,” Buck urged and wedged a hand between them, then wrapped a hand around Eddie’s dick.

Just a tight grip was enough to send him right over the edge, and he couldn’t help but pour his pleasure all over his bondmate. Buck trembled through an orgasm and collapsed against Eddie. He started to move away after a few seconds, but Eddie held him still.

“I’m too heavy.”

“You’re perfect,” Eddie whispered and ran his fingers through Buck’s hair. “Utterly perfect.”

“I’m grateful.”

“For what?”

“Your love,” Buck said. “I can’t say I’ve ever felt I deserved it. Some people think being my Guide is an immense sacrifice. I’ve heard them say it before and after I ascended.”

“Being with you like this is an honor and a privilege,” Eddie said quietly. “And anyone who thinks otherwise knows nothing about you.”

 

 

 

Chapter 5

Christopher leaned on him and curled his fist into the leg of his sweatpants. Buck used his free hand to run his fingers through his son’s hair.

“I’ve missed your pancakes.”

“Yeah?” Buck questioned. “I know, for a fact, that your lito made you pancakes at least once a month while I was gone.”

“Never the peanut butter ones,” Christopher said. “He tried once, and he wouldn’t let us eat them.”

Buck laughed. “Yeah, I wish I could’ve told him he put too much peanut butter in them. I should’ve written that recipe down.”

“Did you watch over us all the time?”

“Every moment that I could,” Buck said as he turned over the pancakes. “It’s my job to keep you guys safe, and I’ll never stop doing that.”

“Will you really ascend again when you get old?”

“Yeah, I will.”

“So, you can watch over me my whole life,” Christopher said quietly.

“Every single day,” Buck promised. “In this life and the next.”

“The next one?” Christopher asked. “How will you find me? I won’t even look the same. I could even be a girl next time.”

Buck laughed. “I’ll always know exactly who you are, Superman. I know your soul like I know your dad’s.”

“And Bea?”

“Of course,” Buck said and put the pancakes on the platter so he could pour some more. “But that’s our family secret, okay? No one else needs to know about my future role on the psionic plane.”

“It feels special,” Christopher said. “Jarra already told me it was none of anyone’s business. She told me you’d come back, too. But she didn’t know when, and I tried not to ask her a lot because I knew she couldn’t give me answers she didn’t have.”

“Your Jarra is very old,” Buck said quietly. “She’s one of the first spirit animals to ever manifest on the psionic plane.”

“Nova’s the first, right?”

Buck looked down. “How did you know that?”

Christopher shrugged. “It just makes sense—the psionic plane chose you, right? It chose you a long time ago, so that means it would’ve sent the oldest and most powerful spirit animal to protect you. Jarra said that Nova has many forms and was once a cave lion.”

“Yes,” Buck agreed.

“Can you ask her to look like one? I want to see what they look like for real.”

Buck laughed. “Maybe—I don’t know if she can change her shape. I wouldn’t want her to think I’m unhappy with the form she chose this time.”

“Nova understands you,” Christopher said. “Only Daddy understands you better.” He released his sweatpants. “I’ll set the table. Will Lito and Grandpa be coming?”

“No, it’s just the four of us this morning,” Buck said. “They’re having a breakfast meeting with the national primes.”

“I like General Rampart,” Christopher said. “He feels strong and solid. Jarra likes him, too. Abuelita thinks he’s pretty.”

Buck laughed. “Well, she’s not wrong.”

He listened in the background as Eddie retrieved Bea from her crib and switched her from a diaper to a pull-up. Buck was kind of sad to have missed being a part of that decision, but he couldn’t fault any of the parenting choices that Eddie had made on his own. Bea had clearly been ready to start potty training because she hated to be dirty and would pitch a fit if her diaper even got wet.

“Where Papa!” Bea demanded as Eddie left the make-shift nursery.

“Making pancakes, Mija.”

“Papa!” Bea called out even as they entered the kitchen. “Papa!”

“She woke up and chose high maintenance today,” Eddie said wryly.

“Every day,” Buck said and finished off the pancakes. He took the platter to the table and then retrieved the bacon and eggs he’d been keeping warm in the oven. “How’s my sweet Bea?”

She huffed and showed him her foot. “Toes.”

“Got a pedicure, I see,” Buck said and took her from Eddie. “You get this from your Daddy.”

“Good foot maintenance is its own reward,” Eddie retorted as he turned off the oven. “At least it’s not glitter this time.”

“No sparks,” Bea said huffily.

Buck kissed her cheek as she started to pout. “No one needs glitter on their body.”

“Blue sparks!” she said firmly and nodded. “Blue!”

“Next time,” Buck promised.

“Enabler,” Eddie muttered with a dark look. “You’re going to remove it when it chips because she hates it when it starts to look bad and pouts like a Texan debutante who was born a month too late to come-out with her friends.”

Buck just grinned at him. “That sounds like experience talking.”

Eddie rolled his eyes. “Both of my sisters were debs, and they were also in beauty pageants from an early age.”

“Gross,” Buck said and kissed Bea’s cheek before putting her in the highchair.

“Cake!” Bea bounced in her chair and reached out for the platter of pancakes.

Christopher pulled it from her reach, and she huffed.

“Chris!” Bea protested.

“They’re hot,” Christopher said. “Your fingers will be ouchie.”

“No ouchie.” She put her whole fist in her mouth.

Buck hesitated over fixing her plate as she hadn’t been feeding herself before he ascended. He felt flat-footed and weirdly off stride with their family rhythm. Eddie’s hand clenched briefly on his wrist as he took the little plastic plate Christopher had provided for Bea.

He took a deep breath and nodded before helping Christopher get eggs and butter his pancakes. Bea ended up with pieces of half a pancake, a spoonful of eggs, and some bacon that Eddie broke up into bite-sized pieces. He took note of the portions specifically because it was important, and he needed to be able to carry his half of the load with their family as quickly as possible.

Bea ignored the spoon she’d been given and grabbed a fistful of pancake immediately. Buck laughed, and she scrunched up her nose at him then put it in her mouth. She grabbed some bacon and waved her fist at him.

“Backen.”

“Bacon,” Buck corrected.

Bea nodded firmly, like they were in agreement. “Backen.”

Eddie laughed and nudged him when Buck just shook his head at her.

* * * *

“We don’t want to crowd you, Sentinel Buckley, so please let us know if you need a break or if the room itself isn’t big enough for the group of people we’ve assembled here,” Tony DiNozzo said.

“Buck is fine, sir,” Buck said and folded his hands in front of him.

Alpha Prime Guide DiNozzo had a sharp and accessing gaze that would have once intimidated Buck, but those days were long gone. The older man nodded and smiled. “Let me do some unnecessary introductions. This is my Sentinel, General Randolph Rampart. We’ve brought a few people who are interested in speaking with you and the one you requested specifically. This is General John Sheppard and his Guide, Dr. Rodney McKay. Across the table, General Jack O’Neill and his Guide, Dr. Daniel Jackson.”

Rampart leaned forward a bit in his chair. “Way to come out swinging, kid.”

Buck smiled briefly. “I tried. I wish I could’ve…done more.”

Rampart sat back in surprise and nodded. “I understand. The death toll is sitting at 643, and most of them were on public beaches. It’s a big loss, and our people are working with FEMA to find every single person. We have the Coast Guard working closely with Sentinel SAR teams as well. Last night, we found four people alive on a stretch of debris about ten nautical miles out.”

Buck nodded.

“In that vein, we have to ask you a question,” Tony DiNozzo said and shared a look with his Sentinel. “Several teams have reported back to us that they’ve felt, at times, a very strong psionic guidance when they were in a position to come to the aid of living victims of the tsunami. And the bodies…. The bodies in the water aren’t acting the way they should.”

“What do you mean?” Buck questioned.

“They’re not being fed on by sea life,” Tony said frankly. “They’re floating on the surface without…water is not kind to the human body after death.”

“No, I know,” Buck said. “Do you think it’s the psionic energy that was absorbed by the water when I was holding the wave?”

“It’s the most commonly accepted theory,” Tony said. “But we wanted to make sure you didn’t have a more informed opinion.”

“I can’t say for certain when it comes to the water. As to the matter of a stronger sense of influence from the psionic plane itself, there is an intelligence on the plane that calls itself the guardian. It presented as female when she finally revealed herself to me. But I think that was largely because the only alteran I responded positively to on the plane was also female.”

Daniel Jackson took in a deep, audible breath, and Tony gave his fellow Guide a nod. “You wanted to speak with me, Sentinel Buckley? Do you need a private meeting, or can the discussion happen here and now?”

“Here and now is fine,” Buck said. “And you can call me Buck.”

“Daniel,” the other man returned with a warm smile. “Tell me everything.”

Buck laughed. “Well, you know it was super boring, right?” Jackson nodded. “When you ascended, they brought you into their collective consciousness, so you were exposed to all of the information they’d gathered as individuals and as a group. This group-think situation was toxic beyond the measure of it. They used the connection to control each other and, in turn, you.”

Daniel frowned. “I don’t actually remember much at all about ascension beyond the fact that I didn’t want to be there once I was there. I was told that I often visited Jack, who struggled without me. I know that I eventually broke the rules because of Anubis, and I was forced to deascend. I woke up naked on another world with no memories of myself. Eventually, an exploration team from the SGC found me. It took me a full year to recover most of my memory, and I still have…gaps.”

“They’re real dicks,” Buck said frankly, and Dr. McKay snorted his agreement. He focused on the scientist. “The AI that governs Atlantis wasn’t deleted. It was removed and stored by an alteran named Janus. He always wanted to tell you because he was proud of the work he did on the AI. The next time you go to the city, the guardian of the psionic plane will lead you straight to her.”

McKay slowly started to stand. General Sheppard put a hand on his Guide’s arm and inclined his head.

“John.”

“McKay, I’m not sitting through all of these conversations without you. I’ll lose my shit. I can barely stand to sit here as is, and you know it,” Sheppard said roughly.

McKay made a face and slouched back down in his chair with a pout.

Sheppard focused on him. “It’s not about you, Sentinel Buckley. I’m genuinely honored to meet you. I’m having some issues with…being so close to the site of a natural disaster. I’ve been promoted above my ability to be useful in such a situation, and it’s galling.”

Buck nodded. “I understand, sir. It must be very difficult for a man in your position.”

“What do you mean?” McKay questioned, gaze narrowing. His hand settled on his Sentinel arm, and Sheppard took his hand.

Buck glanced toward his dad, and Cristobal just inclined his head a little.

“You can say what you’re thinking without any concern of causing offense,” Rampart said. “Sheppard once got a lap dance from a wraith—he’s fucking immune to all Earth-based offenses as a result.”

“First of all, General Rampart,” Sheppard began hotly, and Rampart laughed. “Todd did not give me a lap dance.”

“I still can’t believe you named that asshole Todd,” McKay muttered, then focused on Buck. “If you can, please answer my question.”

“The Sentinel that guards the gate is considered…the Alpha Prime of Earth by the guardian of the psionic plane,” Buck said. “A role that was passed from General O’Neill to General Sheppard. It is a role, frankly, that should always be passed to a Sentinel going forward. If I were in a position to recommend exactly that to the IOA, I would.”

“You are in that position,” Rampart said. “And you can consider that done.”

Sheppard and O’Neill both nodded.

“But let’s not just bandy that title around, okay?” Sheppard said sourly, and Rampart smirked.

Buck had a feeling that all three military men in the room had a long and storied history that would probably amuse him more than it should. “The guardian never answered my questions fully, but I also never got the feeling that I was being misled by her. I asked her, just once, where she came from, and she spoke of living on Earth during a time of great strife for humanity. She said that she achieved psionic harmony so she could defend and protect the plane because it was suffering immense injury due to the circumstances of our people on Earth and on other planets.”

“So, she ascended because of the goa’uld,” Daniel speculated. “A response to the slavery or the kidnapping of our kind from this world?”

“I can’t say specifically. Speaking of it clearly troubled her. She did say once that her bond mate had been destroyed and that they would never live again. Thus, she had no reason to remain part of the psionic cycle that governs the souls of our kind on this world.” Buck paused. “And on other worlds in this galaxy.”

“There is a….” McKay trailed off and grimaced.

“What?” Daniel questioned.

“If a goa’uld managed to survive taking a Guide as a host, the damage done would be permanent and insurmountable. It would be a soul death, Daniel.”

“Jesus Christ,” Rampart muttered.

“It would’ve had to have been a strong and very old goa’uld to accomplish that,” Daniel said with a frown. “Probably not Ra, but one older…we know they used the unas as hosts before they found humans. The species is hardy, but they weren’t ideal hosts for the goa’uld as they proved difficult to maintain complete control over.”

“So, this Sentinel lost their Guide for eternity and sought solace in the psionic plane permanently,” Rampart said lowly. “It makes me want to go to war.”

Buck agreed, and he didn’t have that kind of fight in him normally. He focused on Daniel Jackson again and found the scientist waiting patiently. “They never said either way, but it’s a viable theory. We’ll probably never know the entire truth of it, and maybe that’s for the best because we couldn’t fix it, and ruminating on what we cannot change is a distraction none of us need.”

Daniel Jackson nodded and shared a glance with McKay that Buck couldn’t entirely suss out. He didn’t try to gauge either man’s emotional state out of respect, but he was curious about their silent communication.

“When I first ascended, I wasn’t sure what happened,” Buck began. “I’d been taught about psionic harmony because my father saw from the beginning that I had a profound relationship with the psionic plane. But I should back up and talk about my spirit animal.”

“Okay,” Daniel said. “Her name is Nova, right?”

Buck nodded. “I guess she’s pretty recognizable because of the ladder truck bombing. At any rate, I saw her for the first time when I was around ten years old. My parents don’t love me and never did. I was a savior sibling. My older brother, Daniel, had leukemia, and they couldn’t find a bone marrow donor, so they made one. I had one purpose in their minds, and when the bone marrow transplant didn’t work—I was basically emotionally discarded.

“My brother died, and both of my parents blame me. They grew to hate me for it. By the time I was ten, I didn’t think I deserved to live. I wouldn’t say I was suicidal, but I did think that everyone would be better off without me around. I decided to run away. Nova appeared for the first time that night. She basically prodded me to go to sleep. When I woke up the next morning, everything felt better.”

“The psionic plane…did something to you?” McKay questioned in a subdued tone.

“I think so, yes. Nothing negative, as the psionic plane is entirely without malice. I think it just embraced me and evened out my emotions. Afterward, it was easier to ignore my parents outright. For a while, they didn’t notice. But by the time I was fifteen, they were actively hostile with me. Nothing they said got to me, and they knew better than to physically abuse a latent Sentinel.

“Shortly after I turned sixteen, I found out about my older brother. My mother lost her shit one night and started screaming at me. She accused me of murdering my older brother because I was inferior. It was horrible to learn about his death in that way. My sister explained that he was ill and that he died. She said it wasn’t my fault, and I did believe her at the time. I knew my parents were awful and toxic.

“I graduated high school four months before I turned eighteen. I packed my stuff and ran. I drove a Jeep my sister gave me as far as I could. Then, I took a bus to the Mexico-US border. From there, I walked, took rides, and rode buses as I followed Nova straight to Peru. I came online sometime during that time but didn’t report to a Burton organization until I was in Peru. They asked me to accept a conservator, and I was introduced to several people.

“None of them felt right. Then, one night, Nova brought Cristobal Salas to me.”

“Do you feel unduly influenced by Nova?” Daniel questioned, and Buck shook his head.

“No, she’s very gentle both physically and psionically,” Buck said. “And I can ignore her when she doesn’t want me to do something. It’s happened on the job as she doesn’t like fire and won’t enter a building on fire.”

“Smart girl,” Cristobal muttered, and Buck offered his father a quick smile.

There was a quick knock on the door, and Lou stood from his place at a table near the door. He’d made it clear he’d rather not participate in the actual meeting and was content to observe. The isolation tech was deactivated, and Buck immediately heard his daughter’s cries. He stood even as Lou opened the door.

“Papa!” Bea made grabby hands even as Carla struggled to hold her.

“I’m sorry,” Carla said quickly. “She won’t…settle down. The moment the security in this room was activated, the tether muted with you both, and she’s just…inconsolable.”

“It’s not your fault,” Buck murmured and took Bea. His daughter slumped against him and continued to sniffle. “It was too soon.” He patted her back. “We’ll keep her for now. Thanks for trying.”

Carla smiled and just passed him a small backpack. “Her stuff.”

“Thanks, we’ll see you for lunch?”

“Of course,” Carla said warmly. “Maybe I’ll meander around the kitchen since my favorite little girl is being a diva right now.”

Buck nodded. “We’re brining a chicken.”

Lou shut the door as Carla nodded, then left. He reactivated the security in the room.

Buck walked back to the table and sat down. “My apologies—she’s in a difficult place emotionally.”

“Being online at her age is an unspeakable burden,” Sheppard said, and his nostrils flared slightly. “I hope whoever is responsible for it was duly punished.”

“Certainly,” Lou Ransone said evenly. “In every way that I could get away with legally because his crimes were numerous, and Bea wasn’t the only victim.”

Bea turned her head, laid her face against his chest, and shuddered.

“I’m sorry,” Buck murmured and kissed the top of her head. “If we could hold off on any graphic discussion until she goes to sleep, I’d be grateful.” Everyone around them nodded. “On the plane, I met an alteran named Oma.” He focused on Daniel Jackson, who made a soft, shocked sound.

“She’s…in the end, she sacrificed herself to a fight against Anubis. Did she lose the fight? Is he on the…loose?” Daniel winced and glanced toward Bea, who was sucking on her fist.

“No, it’s gone,” Buck said. “She did sacrifice herself to that fight, but I’m a Sentinel, Daniel. I couldn’t let her do that. It was a terrible existence for her and not something anyone should’ve endured for even a day, much less an eternity. So, I joined her. We destroyed the threat together, and she ensured that the pieces couldn’t come back together in any fashion if you get my meaning.”

“Yeah, I understand. Thank you very much. I remember her fondly.” Daniel cleared his throat. “So, your spirit animal has led you in some fashion or another for a very long time. I saw mine just once before I came online.”

Buck nodded and patted Bea’s back gently. “I didn’t know it was unusual to see your spirit animal a lot before coming online until I was informed of it during the intake process in Lima. But back to the alterans, the psionic plane protected me from their influence, and as a result, I wasn’t exposed to any of their knowledge. They couldn’t control me, and when they tried to exert authority over me…they were removed.”

“Removed?” Daniel questioned.

“Yes, the entity on the plane is the true guardian of the psionic plane, and when the alterans tried to forcefully deascend me while stripping me of my abilities as a Sentinel…the guardian put them down on a planet in Pegasus with no stargate and no memories of who or what they are. In fact, they’ll never remember what they once were. They’ll live on that planet, unaware of the rest of the universe, for the rest of their existence. The population is actually quite small as many who ascended, in the beginning, were removed by the others for so-called offenses over the years.”

“Were the ones in Pegasus also removed?” Sheppard asked curiously.

“Yes, and also another group…they called themselves the ori.”

“They were destroyed,” O’Neill protested. “More than a decade ago.”

Buck shook his head. “They were in a state of limbo—neither here nor there. The guardian spoke, once, of a device that someone tried to use to destroy the ori, but she didn’t allow it to actually function as it would’ve destroyed her and the alterans as well. The psionic plane has no beginning and no end, you see. Anything that impacts the plane in one galaxy would ripple out like a…tsunami across the plane, leaving nothing but destruction in its wake.

“So, she allowed you to think that device worked as intended, and she took charge of the ori while she sat in judgment of them. Shortly before I ascended, she cast the last of them out of the plane.”

“So, they’re deascended as well?” Daniel asked, horror tinging his voice.

“No,” Buck said and shook his head. “She believed the alterans to be selfish and arrogant, but the ori were determined to be irredeemable. Since they were too dangerous to allow even mortal lives and were too corrupted by the impact of psionic worship, they were destroyed.”

“This guardian has a lot of power, then,” McKay said in a subdued tone. “As much as an ascended alteran?”

“She cast them all from the psionic plan en masse with a thought,” Buck said frankly, and McKay’s mouth dropped open just slightly before his jaw tightened, causing his teeth to click together in a barely audible sound. “She doesn’t exist on the plane, Dr. McKay. The guardian exists within the plane, and that makes all the difference.”

“What purpose does she serve now?” Daniel questioned. “Why did the plane keep her?”

“The plane needed guidance and protection from us,” Buck said, and Daniel nodded. “Our existence is a mixture of trauma and victory—sometimes in equal measure. The plane could not bear those injuries repeatedly but also could not ignore them. The guardian mitigates our influence over the plane, and thus, our kind thrives on this world. It became even more of an issue when the goa’uld decided that our kind didn’t have the right to exist amongst the peoples they’d enslaved.

“Thousands of our kind were murdered by the goa’uld,” Buck continued. “It would’ve destroyed us all if the psionic plane had absorbed all of that trauma.”

“If the ancients weren’t keeping you from coming back, then what was?” Dr. McKay asked and rolled his eyes when his Sentinel nudged him. “What? You want to know.”

“McKay, you’re being rude,” General Sheppard said with a reluctant laugh.

“The guardian of the plane basically held me hostage,” Buck said and shook his head when McKay huffed in shock. “She has plans for me, you see, and facilitated my ascension to achieve her goals. Then, she released me when it would put me further in her debt. Had she not interfered, I would’ve died during the ladder truck bombing. So, she saved me.”

“Quite mercenary,” Rampart said mildly. “Are you concerned about the quality of her character, Sentinel Buckley?”

“No, sir,” Buck said. “She’s protected our kind for thousands of years and will do so as long as she must. It’s a duty she took for herself without any sort of evident reward. An eternal life doesn’t seem like any sort of gift if you exist alone. It’s why she allowed the alterans to ascend. She was lonely.”

“But she’s clearly recognized the mistake of that,” Daniel said. “Was Oma cast away the same way as the other alterans?”

“No, Oma was with me until the very moment I returned to Earth and helped me until the end,” Buck said. “I don’t know where she is. The psionic plane adored Oma, so I don’t think the guardian would’ve treated her so callously. I’d hoped that you didn’t come here with the others because she’d appeared at your facility in Colorado.”

Daniel shook his head. “We had unexpected contact with an alien species called the nox. They were concerned about the immense shift they felt in the psionic plane and wanted to know if we had any information about the event.”

“The people who live in the sky city?” Buck questioned and shifted Bea when she started to fuss again. “Sorry.”

“It’s no problem,” Daniel said. “I honestly didn’t expect to ever be in the same room with her at this age. Your family has been reluctant to allow contact with outsiders since your ascension.”

“She’s sensitive,” Eddie said and took her when Bea reached for him. He stood from the table and walked away from them to stand by a large, tinted window. “And open to influence. It’s nothing personal.”

“No, of course not,” Daniel said. “I’d do no different in your place.”

Buck watched Eddie with their daughter for a few moments before focusing on Daniel. “So, here’s the thing. The alterans are living rough on a planet in Pegasus somewhere, and if Oma has been dropped kicked out of the psionic plane and onto that planet with those morally repugnant assholes, I’m going to have to insist you go get her immediately.”

Daniel grinned. “They’re a lot. We’ll start searching for her.”

Light shimmered to his left, and Oma appeared with a little grin. All the other Sentinels in the room sprang to their feet but stilled under the hands of their Guides.

“Oma.” Buck stood and walked around the table. “You’re still ascended?”

“Sort of,” she said and made a little motion with her hand before he plucked her right up and hugged her. “Do I smell human enough?”

“Eh,” Buck said as he put her down. “You’re missing the commercial scents that people use—perfume or scented soaps. You don’t smell alien if that’s your concern.”

“Great.” She smiled winningly. “Can I hold your baby? I’ve never held one.”

“Ever?” Buck questioned and shared a glance with Eddie, who looked startled.

“No, by the time I was an adult, none of my people were actively procreating. They were focused on ascension.” She looked at Bea. “But it’s okay if you’d rather not.”

Buck focused on Eddie and found him staring intently at Oma. Eddie inclined his head then nodded slowly.

“You can try, but she’s very vocal about her wishes if she’s not happy.”

“She should be,” Oma said but then seemed to hesitate when Eddie offered her the baby. “I just…grab her here?”

Buck laughed as he put her hands into place, and Bea laughed with him. Oma took a deep breath as she let Bea rest on her chest. “I’ve…. I want one. How do I get one?”

“There are a couple of ways,” Eddie said wryly, and several men in the room laughed. “You won’t have a problem procuring one the old-fashioned way if you’re inclined.”

Oma stared for a moment. “The old-fashioned way?”

“Jesus Christ, now we know why the ancients are such dicks. Since when did enlightenment include giving up sex?” Jack O’Neill demanded and turned to his Guide. “Daniel?”

“How would I know?” Daniel questioned.

“Hello, Daniel,” Oma said as Bea wrapped her arms around her neck and kissed her soundly on the cheek. “It’s truly lovely to see you again.” Then, she focused on the baby. “She’s amazing. What a beautiful and wonderous thing to have missed out on the first time around. I shall have many.”

“Many?” Buck questioned.

“Many.” Oma nodded firmly. “This one is a girl. Can I see a boy? Do I get to pick?”

Buck shared a look with Daniel Jackson, who was definitely looking alarmed. “Oma, you can’t just…take babies. You know that, right?”

“Oh, of course not, I’m not an asshole,” she muttered and shrugged when Rampart laughed. “Plus, I certainly want to try the natural way. But first, I have to go to Pegasus and kill all the wraith. Because this precious baby should never ever see one of those things.”

“I have two questions,” Daniel asked carefully.

“Just two?” Oma raised an eyebrow. “What a dreadful lie, Daniel.”

Jack O’Neill laughed.

“Two for now,” Daniel clarified.

“Shoot,” Oma said cheerfully.

“Pretty!” Bea announced and patted Oma’s cheek.

“I think you are beautiful as well,” Oma said warmly. “Daniel, your questions.”

“Ah, where are the abydonians? Were they left with the alterans?”

“Oh, no.” Oma shook her head. “They were returned to Abydos sometime ago, Daniel. They lingered for many years in an ascended state then asked to be made mortal again as they were deeply unfulfilled as they were. I took them from their world to save them, but they were not truly ready for ascension. Their souls weren’t meant for it. Their stargate is protected, and they are hidden from the goa’uld.” She paused. “My people sought something we had no right to, and now they are where they belong as well. I have many things to atone for, so I must linger in this state until my burdens are lifted.”

“Why you?” Buck questioned. “Your sins can’t match the others.”

“Perhaps that is the case,” Oma murmured. “But I was the first to achieve ascension, and I brought many onto the path of so-called enlightenment erroneously. Every single alteran that ascended only did so because I facilitated it. I fed their arrogance and their entitlement with my attention for many thousands of years, Buck.

“And now…they are alone, abandoned on a world in Pegasus, living a primitive existence. They’ll never know what was taken from them, and their society will never advance beyond what one would call the middle ages on Earth. At least, not as long as the current guardian is in charge. She is punishing them for their lack of ethics.”

“And you’ll be made to clean up their mess in Pegasus?”

“Oh, it’s my mess,” Oma said quietly. “Well, Janus had a hand in.”

“Doesn’t he fucking always,” McKay muttered.

“Fuk.” Bea bounced cheerfully in Oma’s arms and smiled.

Buck stared at Bea in shock, then glared at Rodney McKay, who at least had the grace to look ashamed of himself.

Eddie laughed. “It’s not the first time she’s said it.”

“Oh, thank god,” McKay muttered. “I’d never live that crap down.”

Bea decided she was done visiting Oma at that point and held out her hands to Eddie. “Da.”

Eddie took her and kissed her cheek. “It’s her grandpa’s favorite curse word.”

Lou cleared his throat and shrugged. “It is.”

“Let’s sit,” Rampart suggested and pulled out a chair. “Ma’am?”

Oma smiled broadly at him and slid into the chair. “As to your second, unspoken question, Daniel. I’m essentially no longer ascended, but I’ve retained all of my…abilities. I’ve been here since Buck decided he wanted to play chicken with a tsunami.”

“I regret all the things I taught you,” Buck muttered when the others laughed. “Did you help with that?”

“Yes, I was on the other side of the bay doing my part to keep it where you wanted it,” Oma said. “Plus, I’ve been guiding search teams to survivors whenever I can find them. I think I’ve found all the ones that were swept out to sea. There was one woman—she was so far out that I knew she wouldn’t make it until help arrived, so I put her on the beach without letting her see me as I wasn’t certain if I should be seen at all. There’s no telling what sort of story she’ll be telling about that experience. It’d be great if she decided she was rescued by a mermaid. I used to come down here and pretend to be one of those creatures all the time.”

“Can you still do the glowing squid thing?” Sheppard asked suddenly and shrugged at the look his Guide sent him. “Because some guys like tentacles, and that could help with your baby procurement.”

Buck huffed. “Oma, you can’t spend any time with those two—you’ll pick up ugly language and bad porn habits.”

“I can still do it,” she admitted, and O’Neill laughed. She turned to Buck. “Do I have to pick just one guy, or can I have a variety? I don’t want to get locked down in some weird human-centric heteronormative monogamous situation if I can help it.”

Buck just stared at her.

She patted his arm. “Think about it and get back to me. I’ll be going to Pegasus tomorrow to kill wraith. Then I have to clean up some other experiments that really shouldn’t have been left laying around and fix Atlantis. After that, I can come back and settle down to make some babies.”

“As long as you’ve got a plan,” Rampart said with a grin.

Part 2