Reading Time: 2 Minutes
As I approach my 37th year as a writer, I’ve been thinking about how I set goals for myself and what feels attainable going forward. Last year I set a great goal, it was motivating but not overwhelming or stressful. I feel great about my success with it. So I’ve set up new goals for myself this year and avoided a word count goal specifically. I’ve realized, over the years, that focusing on quality over quantity relieves some of my stress. So, I’m avoiding a formal word count goal even as I do keep track of my weekly word count as a matter of habit.
OCD being what it is.
Speaking of, I had a rather rude comment on my site asking me about my diagnoses. I deleted the comment because it was rude but I’m not ashamed of my mental health journey. I’m way too old for that kind of shit (49 as of last October). I was diagnosed both with Obsessive Compulsive Order when I was in my twenties and also walked around with the ambiguous label of “clinically depressed” for a decade or two before being given the official diagnosis of Persistent Depressive Disorder. Yes, I’m medicated. It helps. A lot.
I had to go through a lot of meds before I found one that both helped me (on more than one issue) but didn’t impact my ability to write. I settled on Cymbalta a few years ago and it’s done wonders for my depression, anxiety, and diabetes related issues. The commenter told me I should be ashamed of putting my “mental illness on display”. I bet they run around shaming people who talk about their periods in public, too. For the record, I’m still getting my period, too. It sucks a donkey dick. I demand the PAUSE be delivered to my house.
I’ve meandered a little since the subject is supposed to be my writing goals for the year. I didn’t post them last year because I didn’t want to be hassled about posting dates since my goal was to post one completed work a month during the year (and I banged that shit out like a boss).
I have five goals – I love you guys in an epic Internet based way, but I don’t want your input on my actual choices. Your cheerleading, however, is appreciated. In no particular order:
- Update (and maybe expand) What Might Have Been (Writer’s Cut!)
- Finish one EAD project (no suggestions allowed)
-
Finish my Quantum BangDraft Complete 1-19-24 - Start the rewrite on Small Magic
-
Create a goal list and post it for my own accountability
I’ve no schedule in mind for these goals, so please don’t ask. I’m just living my life over here and I thought you might like to get a peek of what my writer’s table looks like right now. I did remove Small Magic from the EAD community because of the rewrites and potential posting schedule (that I’m not sharing) because I expect to make some pretty big changes to events, plot, and structure to make room for my head canon (The Arda Exodus ruined my brain).
If my plans fall through, I will put Small Magic back up on EAD. I promise it’s not gone forever.
My current inspiration:
Yeah, I know. Be prepared for Unrequited/Not Unrequited/Dumbasses Are In Love Fic.
~KM
* * * *
I hope this year treats you well, Keira! Also glad I managed a reread of Small Magic a couple of weeks ago now that it’s gone for the foreseeable future. If the rewrite pans out, I’ll be exited to see the changes!
Cheering you on from the sidelines as always
I’m SO excited by your plans for 2024.
Cheering you on from the UK
Feel free to delete this comment if you need to, but I get emails when you post and the link to this post is broken in the email. I understand that’s a site issue and not something you can do anything about, but you should know it’s happening. It just keeps cycling a redirect when I clicked the link.
Can you forward that email to me: keiramarcos@gmail.com
Thanks!
I had the same problem. I ended up going here to your website.
How are you subscribed? Can you forward me that email?
Same for me. Forwarding now!
all of your goals sound amazing and i can’t wait to see (and read) what this year brings for you!!!!
you’re my favorite writer ❤️
(also quick thank you for the reassurance that snall magic is bot gone forever the hp/tolkien crossovers you write mean the world to me)
I think your goals are good. i myself find being open about mental health issues is a good thing helps those who are scared of theirs to get the help they need. i hope the year goes well for us all.
Can I just say, you are amazing and thank you for sharing what you have and what life is like for you. Even just that glimpse lets people know they aren’t alone so thank you. Anyone that has an issue with how you live YOUR life that doesn’t effect them doesn’t deserve your time or energy. Wishing you nothing but the best in 2024.
Thank you for all you do looking forward to whatever you wish to share with us
Have extremely enjoyed everything that I’ve read
Keira don’t listen to that Asshat or any like them. You are a wonderful person and writer who is helping others in dealing with their issues by showing such courage dealing with yours. You are hands down my favorite author and I enjoy every gift you give us. I’m glad you are doing well and wish you the best for 2024. As far as no longer having periods, it is a happy day when that came about, not so much the hot flashes. HUGS!
I get the hot flashes already! The PAUSE was not delivered.
Well that really sucks! Mine stopped abruptly at the same time as hot flashes really ramped up. I just realized that I was incredibly fortunate on that timing. Sending good thoughts that issue straightens out immediately.
I had perimenopause for several years but didn’t experience actual menopause until age 52. I was extremely ready after 40 years of that stuff except during 3 pregnancies.
I’m going to be 58 this spring, and JUST NOW reaching my one-year mark, where I’m officially in menopause.
You guys are hurting my feelings.
I’m hot all the time. 30 degree temp and I’m fanning myself. A sheet sometimes is to hot to sleep under. This peramenopause and menopause stuff is bullshit. I’ve skipped a month here or there and then it comes back with a vengeance.
I feel so seen right now. Sometimes I can’t even stand to be in my skin.
I’m convinced that a hot flash + sneeze = spontaneous human combustion
Unfortunately I was so hot at night I had to use fans except in deep winter. That only started getting better in the couple of years and I’m in my mid sixties. I always made sure I had a back up fan incase one of the others quit. The flip side is it really helped my heating bill in the winter and the two fan keep the ac issue doable in summer.
Fans are my friends right now. I have a 7 pointed in my direction when I try to sleep. One died a couple of weeks ago and I immediately found a new one.
Having just turned 50, one day before your birthday, I too am eagerly awaiting the PAUSE myself. I would also accept the FULL STOP any day now. I for one am so so grateful for you sharing your mental health journey as it helped to spur my own. Your writing never ceases to amaze me and I look forward to each new story you gift us with.
Best thing about hitting 50’s is the Pause! Much love. I’m thinking I may look into cymbalta, I’m diabetic and have been using herbal to combat the depression that I’ve been fighting for years because going back on meds just terrifies me but your comments give me hope, thanks. Also to the moron who shamed you for discussing your mental health, you probably need to see someone about your damage. Really, if we don’t talk about it it just gets worse. I’m thrilled about your goals because you’re gonna write more and I’m so addicted to your voice it makes me happy! Happy New Year!
I greatly appreciate your open discussion of your struggles, your challenges, both personal and craft basesd, and your no BS approached to others critques. Thank you, for all of it.
I love your openness about mental health and hopeful menopause vs the lovely monthlies, as an enjoyed of both the MH and the MP, I salute you.
Looking forward to whatever you decide to give us, have a fabulous 2024 x
Well idiots/dumbasses in love is one of my very favorites tropes, so I look forward to seeing what you do with that.
You’re a badass in the best way. Your writing lifts the community. Love the goals and the openness.
I always enjoy your stories because you have a talent in making them so interesting. I am sorry that you have these disorders but am happy that you are doing well. Thank you for all of your wonderful work!
The health shaming is so weird!
I can’t make clothes so I buy them, everyone’s fine with that.
I can’t make hormones and neurotransmitters I need, SO I BUY THEM! And loud idiots freak out! (I don’t pay any attention to quiet idiots ♀️)
Thank You for sharing your stories, personal and fictional.
Dear Kiera,
Cheering incoming from Germany!
Love your writing, your open dialogue about just everything and your setting of boundaries – I learned so much from you, and for that alone I will forever be thankful!
But I have one favor to ask … after you received your PAUSE, please keep hold of the delivery person and sent him straight my way … 53 years old already, and still waiting! This shit has been going on for 43 years over here, and no end in sight …
Thank you in advance, and may your writing bring you nothing but joy!
Ibanara
I will absolutely truss that motherfucker up and send him your way.
I stopped setting word goals for myself a couple of years ago. It’s demoralizing when you don’t reach them, even if it’s totally out of your control. I’m excited for you this year; those goals look like they’ll be fun to work towards.
As for your health (mental and otherwise), it’s none of anyone’s business but yours. Talking about it can be hard, so I appreciate that you’ve been so open. I wish you nothing but success this year!
Dumbasses in love sounds perfect; keeping my fingers crossed that you’ll be inspired to write about a few of MY favorite dumbasses again! 🙂
And thanks for sharing some of your troubles; I thankfully have been free of mental health problems (so far), but was diagnosed with breast cancer shortly before Christmas. Had a lump removed from one boob last week, and the prognosis is good — early stages, non-urgent, no lymph nodes afflicted, and I most likely can get away with hormone pills and a few radiation treatments. No chemo, whew. Still, not something you’re thrilled to hear when you’re very much on the wrong side of sixty.
I’m just glad that menopause is over and done with; had just a handful of hot flashes over the years, but needed to have an IUD inserted to stop my period altogether for the last few years to manage the problems I did have. But yeah, ~50 years of that mess was more than enough, so good riddance!
Anyway, keeping my fingers crossed for you that you can put at least the whole physical female crap behind you ASAP!
You do you. I’m happy with whatever you are willing to share when you are willing to share. In the meantime, I happily reread everything you shared so far. <3
I'm glad you are doing well on your medications, and I hope it stays that way.
I hope 2024 will treat you well.
Thank you for everything you've shared so far.
P.S.: The link in my mail was broken too.
Yeah, it looks like WordPress’ redirect is weirdly broken.
As a healthcare professional myself, I would like to thank you for sharing your journey. Mental health issues are still stigmatized, and I love that you are open with what you have been experiencing. Conditions which affect the brain are no less important to treat the conditions that affect the body, in fact, I would argue they are more important. I find it a shame that persons don’t respect it. Perhaps, if we respect people more for who they are and what they’re going through, we would have less issues as a society.
Again, thank you and wishes.
How exciting!! Looking forward to whatever you put out there (and I’ll just reread the old stuff if life happens).
As for the rest:
– if more people talked about mental health in the same way people say “I have diabetes” or “I’m allergic to peanuts,” then maybe people would talk about it more.
– I’m 57 and am only just now thinking that I’m over this period crap. My children are in their 20s and I don’t need this PITA any more. Of course, now it waits for whenever it would be most inconvenient. Blah.
It’s like we’re sharing the experience. It’s awful over here.
Why do people think talking about your own health is shameful? I have no issues talking about my hysto and how life changing it is (no but for real!). I have no problems about talking about my ADHD, my depression. These things make me who I am, and NONE of them are something to be ashamed of. Shame on that person for their comment, andi am so happy to hear your meds are doing their thing. It’s absolutely AMAZING when everything works!!!
I can’t wait to be here on your journey for completing the other goals. We’re here to cheer!
Dear Ms. Marcos,
I wish you all the best with your personl life and health. Horrible itching in personal places on those who seem to feel that they have any right to dictate anything at all to someone who is both kind and generous in sharing her storytelling and world building skills as freely aas you do.
Seriously – thank you for what you have give over the years.
Is Pocket Guardian available anywhere? I have a bookmark to chapters 3-4.
Warmest regards
Check the EAD page
Awesome. Fingers crossed all goes well for you this year.
I’m going to miss Small Magic, but I’m also looking forward to what changes you will make – and I am very much willing to wait. Good things etcetera. And dumbasses in love sounds excellent 😀
Whatever you share with us is amazing and a gift. I hope 2024 treats you well and that you have fun in meeting/changing/exceeding/ignoring goals as needed for whatever creative sparks ignite your interest.
I will say The Arda Exodus broke my brain in a most epic way and was one of the most enjoyable fic reads of the last few years. Thank you again for that creation.
You do you! Do what feels best for you. Stupid people are legion, but they don’t count for anything.
I love every single goal on your list and I’m waving my virtual pompons for you. I hope you’re gonna be well and reach all of them.
Thank you for 2023 and for all the years before. I still read some of your old stories when I’m feeling down and they always cheer me.
May you have a great 2024!
I am appalled at the rudeness of someone who would leave such a comment on your site. Not to mention the sheer stupidity – surely it’s much better if we’re all open about these things? Not only does it help to remove stigma, but if we all talk about it, we might learn things from each other.
Anyway, sorry you had that to deal with. As for your goal setting, I hope you continue to find the process useful rather than a burden. I will merely sit here and eagerly devour the results, which are bound to be awesome.
Thanks for all you give us.
I LOVE this post and am totally cheering for you!
Also, crossing fingers for the PAUSE to visit. I had a hysterectomy (kept my ovaries) on my 45th birthday, which was 9 years ago last month. That bitch tried to kill me more than once and in multiple ways, and I feel like the universe gifted me an easy progression into the Pause as a gift.
Not sure where you plan to expand in what might have been but i applaud your ambitions bc i love that series, however i always find all your post read to me as complete regardless of if you have something in reserve for it or not. I have never been able to tell when you think something is done forever unless you tell us but il never ask bc i love being surprised by your gifts. (Also i really dont want my fix being taken away from me) Omg small magic to?!? I love it and have it on repeat reread list too. Hope you have loads of fun revisiting things and making new beautiful stories for yourself and us to share with sometimes 😛
The PAUSE came after two years of hot flashes, I hope that is not your case, I am also 49 years old. I hope all your goals are met, you are one of my favorite authors, greetings from very far away.
Ok, I just need to add a couple of comments or I will explode:
1. What might have been is my favourite fiction I ever read. Like ever. Since I was about 17 and discovered what a fanfiction is (I’m 33). I try not to read it more than once a year in order not to ruin it for myself, by knowing every single word. It is just gorgeous!
2. People are dicks! And karma is real, SO!
3. I recently discovered what rumination is from one of your fictions. I never new this was a thing and I thought it was normal. It helped a great deal to understand. So thank you!
4. I know not a single person that is not struggling with something, and frankly being respectful, which is bare minimum that should be expected, would go a long way for all of us.
5. I have a very embarrassing confession. I don’t know if you get statistics of how much times one user entered your site, but if you do, than I might just take the first place. I just have to check a couple of my favourite pages every time I open a browser . I kind of fell into this compulsion in the last few years. That being said, seeing a new post is sometimes the highlight of my day, so I’m not going to stop!
6. I love EAD! I have the date marked on my calendar every year.
7. I loved everything you’ve ever written. If I don’t know the fandom I will get to know it so that I can read it. I love your portrayal of the characters, you give them the depth that is often missing in original. You can also show true humanity in your characters and it is very beautiful and very hopeful despite the topic of the work being heavy sometimes.
I am a little scared that one day you will have enough of aholes and will decide not to share any more and I wouldn’t blame you, but I do love being here every day.
Have an amazing 2024!
Honestly, people who get upset by others talking about their mental health are usually hiding from theirs.
And Small Magic and The Arda Exodus have become my new canon for the Tokleinverse and Harry Potter Univers. That’s part of the joy of your writing, you build such amazing worlds and cultures for us to live in. Heck I’m even tempted to watch shows like NCIS so I’ll be able to understand references in your stories set in that universe.
You could probably get away with skimming the first three seasons of NCIS if you were genuinely interested but no more is really necessary when it comes to references as I barely remember the show and often have to refer to a wiki OR the timeline Jilly James graciously gave me.
I thank you for all your work, spent many enjoyable hours reading it. No one has the right to tell anyone what they should or should not say on their personal health.
I’m in my 6o’s and post menopausal. Glad my friends suggested an Internist when I was in my 50’s. Every woman needs a great physician that will explain what is happening to you, your choice of treatments, basically teach you what you should have been taught way before you start having symptoms.
Have a wonderful 2024
I can’t wait fir more of your stories! So glad I found you thus year. Its kept my mind busy and not thinking of losing my husband. Hi look forward to more goodness from you. I can’t lie Atlantis and Sentinel stories are my favorite.
Please accept my condolences on the loss of your husband. I’m genuinely sorry but also pleased that I was able to give you something to focus on during such a difficult and heartbreaking experience.
I am so sorry for your loss (literally crying for you right now). I also find Kiera’s works a great comfort when terrible things are happening in my life. Welcome to the community.
I am just really looking forward to whatever you post this year!
I found you through your HP ff’s and somehow ended up reading fanfiction of a series I don’t even watch. Now I’m in love with Buck/ Eddie and don’t even know what is actually canon! xD
Save to say, I love your writing and your writing style and I am looking forward to reading more from you.
Thank you for writing and sharing it with us! 🙂
Big cheer from a German currently chilling (and going to university) in Ireland 😀
Thank you for sharing your journey. I find it inspiring when someone speaks their truth in regards to mental health, as it has more of a stigma than female issues. I’m glad that you have found a process that works for you and I continue to look forward to whatever you choose to share.
As an aside, the link in my email worked so maybe they fixed the glitch.
I am so looking forward to anything you write this year. I read and reread your stories often. I’m certain I’ll love Small Magic once you rewrite it. It was my favorite of the EAD stories alongside the resorting fic.
I skipped the messyness of preimenopause and menopause because of surgery for other female health issues. I applaud you for discovering a way to handle your mental health. I’m one of the unlucky ones who can’t be medicated due to side-effects and just have to tough it out.
Also, my email link worked just fine so maybe WordPress has sorted itself out now.
Thank you for sharing your journey, your thoughts, and your writing with us.
Hope 2024 is a great one for you and yours.
Amd f**k those who try to put you, and any of us readers, down.
So excited to hear about your plans to work on Small Magic, I adore that story (along with pretty much everything you write,, but that story was my gateway drug into The Hobbit fics)! Also, I am excited for Dumbasses in Love fics
First, I want to say that I really appreciate when folks I admire are honest about their mental health (and other) struggles! It helps me to feel seen and less broken.
Second, and I apologize if this is rude or inappropriate. I don’t intend it as such. I was wondering if you’d be willing to share anything about how you decide on your goals and what is helpful/attainable and what is unreasonable. I feel like I’m always asking too much of myself, which is not good for the mental health, but I only realize that my goal wasn’t really fair/attainable in retrospect. I was hoping you might have a tip or two that would help!
I’ve been asking myself these questions:
1. What is a reasonable goal?
2. Will it hurt if I fail to meet this goal?
3. Is this goal too big? How can I make it more manageable?
4. What’s important to me?
Healthy boundaries are awesome but their YOUR boundaries so why the fuck does anyone else get to have an opinion? If they come visiting your website to biych about the content that is in no way your problem, or that hf anyone else brave enough to speak up. Not like your standing over us forcing people to read your work.
I’d just like to say it’s always a nice surprise to see a new post and I love the voice you give your characters, especially when they say the shit we all think but are worried everybody else will take badly.
I’ll think positive thoughts (or negative ones???) about those bastards in charge of women’s reproductive health, definitely a man in charge over there.
Hope 2024 treats you well, both IRL and in real life
I love the “Finish one EAD project (no suggestions allowed)” goal. It makes me giddy with excitement. I hope you reach all of your goals and I can’t wait to see what you put out this year.
You are one of my favorite authors. I teach psychology, and I asked permission to use a quote from What Might Have Been in my class when I talk about dealing with the death of a loved one and grieving.
In terms of mental health: I am very open in my classes about my own struggles with depression and being diagnosed with ADHD at 62 (I am 67). I don’t know what my students may be going through, and it might help if they see someone in a position of some authority treating it as fairly normal to struggle with mental health issues.
I think when you, Keira, or anyone who is in a public role of some sort is open about their struggles, it can help others realize that it isn’t something to be hidden or to be ashamed of. When your characters talk about it, it also helps to normalize it.
I remember that request about the grief quote. How do students respond to you quoting fan fiction, out of curiosity?
You have every right to say what you like about your own health, mental or physical, but some people are so rude and judgemental. Personally I wonder what they are hiding from, as everyone has some issues and they seem to knock others in order to make themselves feel better.
Hate to say it, but I have a decade on you and I am still waiting! My body cannot summon up the energy to do even basic things, but despite that periods seem to be a priority. I hope you have only a short time to wait.
You have an extraordinary gift of imagination and a talent for world building, which has produced these awesome stories which take us away from the daily grind. Thank you so much for your generosity in sharing your talents and I hope you have a rewarding and successful year.
I will enjoy whatever you write and post when you get the chance. I reread your works often. I started with your SGA stories and damned you even got me reading Harry Potter which at one time I never thought would happen. From then on into other fandoms. Thanks.
I hear you on the mental health issue. I went through a long series of surgeries and the accompanying financial difficulties for some years and the depression was hell to deal with on top of it. I even had relatives tell me to buck up and just deal. Yeah right.
Periods were hell from the time I was fifteen and I started begging for a hysterectomy. I always got a metaphorical pat on the head and the reassurance that I would change my mind later. I never did and finally at 48 was able to have a total hys. What a relief and it was added to when it was found that due to the multiple female problems I had that I’d never have been able to carry a child if I had wanted one. Damn doctors, always thinking they know what is best.
I honestly think it’s pretty incredible that you set goals at all AND follow through with them! That’s something I’m very terrible at. It’s a fun coincidence that I’m reading What Might Have Been for the first time. I’ve read nearly everything on your site at this point so no matter what or when you post I’ll be thrilled!
I am just happy to read what ever you want to write and post. Hopefully 2024 is a good year for you
Keira your mental health issues are your own to talk about as you wish ! Fuck the commenter who tried to shame you!!
You are an awesome writer and I’ve reread what might have been so many times. Even if you decide not to post about that story know it is awesome and so are you.
Cheering you on from the sidelines!
I’m excited for your goals list <3
Thank you for always sharing with your readers your talent and your journey.
Fuck those that don’t seem to keep stupid comments to themselves or keep scrolling by if they don’t agree with something.
Wishing you a bright year Keira!
You continue to make this a most wonderful place to be. No one is perfect. Everyone has struggles. But we support and we cheer and we share in the safe spaces you create for us. Your words not only fill so many pleasant hours, they teach. I have learned so much from you over the years. About four years ago I was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum and given actual tools to make life work for me instead of against me. I just always thought I was broken because I didn’t understand other people.
I love your goals for the year and the thought that one of your EAD stories could get promoted to your regular site makes me giddy. I’m terribly glad you aren’t taking suggestions as I could never choose a favorite.
Good luck in your endeavors and may the Pause take effect soonest. Much love, cookies and your favorite tea.
Looking forward to the upcoming year. I love the worlds you create, the characters you bring life to and lovely plots that keep you guessing. Thank you for all that you have shared.
Hope 2024 is a great year for you in your personal life and you fulfill all your goals – literary and otherwise.
Squeeeeeeee!
Geriatric Fangirl, reporting for duty!
\o/
A writer’s cut of WMHB
Small Magic for the win!
Whatever you have up your sleeve for QB is sure to be awesome.
Asshats on the internet are ignorant, arrogant and entitled. It’s rarely a pleasant combination. Good on you, as the Aussies say, for policing your boundaries…
I literally just finished re-reading Small Magic yesterday. So glad I did to enjoy it one last time before the rewrite. Looking forward to it, though if it comes back the same, also looking forward to it. Good luck on your goals.
“I demand the PAUSE be delivered to my house.”
TL/DR – I had surgical PAUSE delivered in 2018, and I’ve become a grumpy depressed BITCH since then and I’m NOT HAPPY ABOUT IT. Regrettably, I can choose between no migraines + mild high blood pressure OR hormone replacement therapy. (I *like* not having migraines every time it rains, thanks!!)
I don’t recommend it, personally. I had my ovaries removed in 2018 because my cycles were getting shorter and shorter, my periods heavier and longer, and more and more painful – I was down to 25 days between, 5 days of bleeding, and at *least* 2 days off work in bed with a heating pad due to severe cramping – from a woman who’d been used to extremely irregular cycles her whole life (anywhere between 30-40 days), 3 days of normal bleeding, and never needing more than mild analgesics. Given that I was already 48 and had had 7 kids, I certainly didn’t need those organs, so I said get rid of ’em! I had just the ovaries and fallopian tubes removed because it’s an outpatient surgery and much faster to heal from than removing the uterus as well (I didn’t have the available sick time to take 2 weeks off work at the time, given how much time I’d taken off work up ’til then due to the already-mentioned issue). Now here I am, 5 years later, and I am admitting that the lack of hormones has me actively depressed and I’m trying to figure out what to do about it. I was *surprised* at how much difference there is in my sex life (okay, I still enjoy sex because it does feel good, but I don’t really think about it any more and I can take it or leave it, but it’s REALLY REALLY HARD TO REACH ORGASM and always a surprise when I manage it.) And orgasm itself isn’t the same or nearly as good. It’s sudden, sharp, and more of a tension relief than anything else. 😛 But that’s not that big of a deal, honestly. It’s the grrrrrrrrr. I’m moody, depressed, BORED, and easily irritable. It’s been five years, I gave it a few years for my hormones to settle down and stabilize before I started to judge it, but yeah, I’ve been actively working on doing something about it for the last year. I considered hormone replacement therapy; however, we finally found a medication that actually *prevents* my migraines in September 2022…and I know the exact date that I started on the medication, because 2 weeks after I started on it, the peripheral neuropathy from it had caused clumsiness and I fell down and broke my arm. The neuropathy eventually wore off after I adjusted to the medication; however, the higher blood pressure from it did not, and they won’t give me HRT with higher blood pressure. 😛
So I’m working on finding something to deal with the depression/moodiness. It’s becoming very bad the longer it goes and I reaaallly don’t like it. If we hadn’t found a medication that successfully dealt with the migraines, I’d be in a worse space, but being headache free has helped.
Also:
“I didn’t post them last year because I didn’t want to be hassled about posting dates since my goal was to post one completed work a month during the year (and I banged that shit out like a boss).”
YES YOU FUCKING DID and I LOVED IT!! You’re one of my top five favorite authors, the five that I always recommend to people as having consistently quality writing, and it was *fabulous* having regular updates from you to read last year. THANK YOU SO MUCH!! It was awesome getting to see my inbox and go OOOH NEW STORIES FROM KEIRA! WOOOOOT!!!!
Especially when a lot of other authors I’m reading had switched fandoms lately, and you had gotten *into* fandoms I’m reading, instead of *out* of them. 😀 (Actually, you’re one of a few authors whose writing I will read in a new fandom I’ve never read before, to decide if I like it or not, because the writing quality is always good enough and I know that I can trust the characterization well enough to get a sense for the characters in a new fandom.)
All the cheerleading over here! I love your work SO much – I have devoured literally every word you’ve written that I can find, and loved every bit of it. I literally read your stuff in fandoms I’ve NEVER seen or heard of (LOL). Grateful always just to see what new stuff you come up with 🙂
And sorry you have to deal with some people who think mental health issues should be private – as someone else who has a multitude of neurodivergencies/mental health issues including PDD/dysthemia, I think you rock!
I will always love your writing and wonderful world-building. So much of what you write has become my personal head-cannon for multiple universes! I too find that thinking and talking about my mental health issues (ADHD, anxiety, depression) and medications as medical issues helps both me and others re-frame them *as* medical issues. Thank you so much for sharing.
Last year i went to read all of my favorite fics from you and i didn’t realize how much there was and how old some were. It’s been a real pleasure to have so many awesome fics and it is pretty exciting to read about possible news on What Might Have Been.
It’s been, with the Lantean Legacy, one I really enjoy coming back to read.
I am curious about Small Magic, and will be happy to see were you’re taking this with a rework if you end up posting it, be it in future EAD or as a completed project.
Best of luck on all of your goals and writing in this new year 🙂
What the actual fuck is wrong with people the audacity to come to Your site and comment on something personal that you have chosen to share. Absolutely flabbergasted
Anyhoosey thank you for sharing a glimpse into your mental health journey with us delighted your medication is medicating the way you need it too. Great goals for the year I hope 2024 is a decent one not aiming to high after the last few years.
I am so grateful for your work last year and all you will do this year. I resisted Gratua for 2 or 3 years and then gave in and now I have read it 3+ times and fallen deep deep down the Star Wars rabbit hole. Also your (and Jilly’s) fics regularly make my sheltered self look at things from a whole new and much deeper perspective. I really appreciate the way events and reactions laid out through the characters experiences share life lessons.
I have Covid (and my period to add insult to injury) at the moment (mild thankfully). But this post and the comments have made my day.
On the other side: my mom had a few mild pregnancy like symptoms and then about a year of heavy twice a month cycles that then full out stopped and that was it. No other menopause symptoms…. So there is some hope that it will not be a terrible drawn out process.
Cheers to this years goals and to the successful completion of last years!
I wanna be your mom when I grow up.
Your mom was lucky. I had one final period where I thought I was gonna literally bleed to death…then five years of hot flashes. Thank god those went away!
I love that you added a goal so you can cross it out. I always add something so I can immediately cross it out because it is deeply satisfying and very motivating.
Also, my favorite cheerleading is the Taiwanese 加油加油！This literally means add gas add gas! I love this chant and wish you lots of petrol for 2024.
I’m endlessly amused seeing you add something to your list that you can immediately cross off and I do the same exact thing.
I’m sorry there was such a rude comment concerning your mental health. I can only imagine someone who went out of their way to say that must have way too much time on their hands. I offer virtual hugs, if you want them.
Good luck and though I hated cheerleading for the entire time I did it, I’ll happily cheer over the interest for you \o/
Wow. It was so interesting reading the comments. Here I am at 32 trying to have kid for first time and feeling blessed having regular periods so it is easier to keep track of in order to conceive. And there you all are done with it. It was such a different perspective and kind of made me jealous because periods are such a b*tch (even if I need them atm).
My mom has been having hot flushes for ten years now even though she is done with the bloody part as far as I know. Being a woman such a hassle sometimes.
And for your goals, I believe I can only appreciate them because it is not my place to have say about them. So! So excited for what the new year will bring!
And the mental health thing – I started at one point to be open about my issues with depression and it led more than one person to seek help. That makes me happy being able to help them in someway.
Thank you again for sharing your writings
Congrats on 37 years! That’s awesome. I am also sorry to her the PAUSE has not happened. I had mine surgically enabled. 😉 I’m still over here cheering you on. Go you!
Cheerleading from the middle of the US. I hope your goals are inspiring and fun for you. Dumbasses in love is the best. So, like everyone else, I look forward to anything you do with it. I had to squee a bit when I saw the What Might Have Been was on your radar. I think that is one of my favorite SGA fics of yours. It’s certainly one I reread a lot. So I look forward to seeing what you do with it.
The Arda Exodus is fantastic and has certainly subsumed my headcannon on Dverger. So, I can see how it might impact other HP/Hobbit crossovers.
Your willingness to create boundaries (and talk about almost anything) inspires me on the regular. Perimenopause/Menopause is crazy frustrating. I hope that you are spared interactions with your medications. Mine ramps up hot flashes to the nth degree. So yeah!
Thank you for creating safe spaces for authors and readers and sharing your stories with us. I can’t wait to tag along on your journey this year.
As always I love your work, and your snark. I too would love the pause to finish up. I started it young 32, but drugs they gave me for a semi related issue stopped it again. Aunt Flo from there on has been a regular foe since . Have fun with your goals, may you be pleased with the results.
I gotta say, the fact that you shared your health with us is huge. You didn’t have to, but you know this. I, personally am grateful because you’ve given me an idea of how to possibly manage my anxiety and diabetic issues, so I thank you. (I’m on Metformin, my stomach is a mess!). I’m sad that Small Magic is gone for awhile, but happy that you’re working on it. Can’t wait to see that. Your Arda series is amazing, by the way. Pretty sure I squeed over it in the post comments. Thanks for the update!
What a fucking asshole. As a neurodivergent person with bipolar 2, I am always happy to see people talking about their diagnoses and mental health. It’s a perfectly ordinary thing to do. Props to you for not letting that bitch stop you from sharing your truth.
Also, I am here cheerleading all the way. You are an amazing person whose writing hopefully makes you as happy as it makes the rest of us. I wish you luck in all your endeavors this year!
I squeed like a 12 yo girl at her first live boy band concert at your first goal. Yes!! I love that series. I just devoured it again before posting this note. (In fairness, it’s not my fav solely because Meredith McKay in •Heart of a Lion• is my fav of your SGA stories. Whenever I need a pick me up to show a strong woman kicking ass and taking names, I read it.)
I found your site thru HP fiction years ago, but I stayed and read everything because of your SGA stuff.
Thank you for sharing your works with us.
So excited!!!! I so look forward to everything. I hope the year has treated you well so far despite asshole comments. People really can’t help themselves, the mind boggles.
I love that you post your goals, it’s a teaser for us and something to look forward to. You’re first listed, working on what might have been! I was dancing in my chair! That’s one of my all time faves. I have retread the series so many times. Thanks for all you do and sharing it with us.
One last thing that is NOT a request or suggestion . The Vanguard series is another fave that I’m patiently waiting in anticipation of the story. Thanks
Your Arda Exodus broke my brain also – I’m absolutely fascinated once again by your work.
For the rest – it takes courage to be open with health problems that aren’t as obvious as a broken ankle, and it shouldn’t. What a person likes or needs to share should be treated with respect. Who can’t or won’t be reminded of health problems of the mind has the freedom to just not read those posts. All my best wishes for your health, in body and mind.
Years ago YOUR work did wonders for my mental health. Just wanted you to know.
I am always thrilled to see any post from you and grateful. I don’t understand why people feel the need to shame others and try to shush?! If we were more open and honest about our struggles, whether they be health, wealth, or just getting through a patch, I think the world would be a better place. Maybe solutions wouldn’t be so hard to find? Maybe seeking help wouldn’t take so long?
I find so much comfort in your work and the community you have built – I laugh, I cry, I get cranky…I have all the emotions. Thank you for being you!!
Welcome to the merry hell that is getting old as a woman.
Not to piss on your parade, but I was in menopause for over 8 years. It got so bad my husband used to regularly hide the kitchen knives. The flushes do get somewhat better after a while (I’m talking years, not months) but I’m unsure what god I displeased to deserve this.
As Jilly is fond of saying, you be you, and fuck the rest. I’d read the back of a cereal box if you wrote it.
Wishing you cool nights and wet flannels
Daisy x
Yeah, being a woman is hardcore.
Keira don’t listen to losers who tell you not to do something because it’s not their business. You are a fantastic and talented writer and I admire how you continue to write even when you might not feel well enough.
I am sad that Small Magic is gone temporarily, but thank you for reassuring us that you will eventually bring it back.
Hi. I work as a peer support worker in mental health and I am a mental health advocate (and I live somehow happily with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder). I want to thank you for your honesty and openness. You are role model for a lot of people and being so open about your mental health issues can help a lot of people. Thank you
Hi Keira- all the best for 2024. I am 66 and after 40 years as an Australian public servant, I, too, have been diagnosed PDD, PTSD , agorophobia to name just a few. Medication is essential BUT you have been my anchor.
Your stories of Rodney and John, ie Ties, What might Have Been and Sentinals, have kept me tied to sanity.
You are an exceptional author (1st level English student here, so I can tell the difference) and I would rather read your writing than Thomas Hardy. Your plots and characterisations are clever and your humour very load-lifting. My daughter and I have even adopted some of your terminology in our everyday language.
Please do not allow rude, impolite or ignorant comments to detract from the knowledge that you are a very talented and extraordinary author.
Thank you for the time and effort you put into the stories that we love.
Regards Diane ( and Lorelie-daughter)
I hope you guys are having a great new year!
Thank you very much.
Keira,
You are as brave, as you are an EXCEPTIONAL writer. It takes courage to talk about your mental health, but the person in question should not have asked either way. Everyone of us have some form of mental issues, so what. It is no one’s business but yours.
I am going through what you are going through right now, I’m 55 this year. I’m told it will last at least 5 years…for my sanity, I really hope not!
THANK YOU for your creativity, kindness and wonderful vision. Such creativity is rare.
Thanks for the update. I love Small Magic so seeing what you do with it should be fun. The twist at the end always gets me in the feels and I really like the frank discussion between Harry and Hermione.
As for the post you pruned, I’m glad you didn’t let it impact you. People, in general, should honestly be talking more about these things. My wife has Bipolar 2 and was misdiagnosed for 20 years and not properly medicated for it. It caused her and our family, a lot of unnecessary grief. I’m glad to hear that your symptoms are managed without overly impacting your creativity.
Medicating these conditions is unfortunately still more art than science, but for anyone struggling, please don’t give up. My best piece of advice for those who feel like the medication isn’t helping is that if you’re seeing a primary care for your issues, consider seeing a specialist. They are better trained to help you find the right medication(s). If your specialist isn’t helping you enough, then get another one. We went through three before we found someone who really listened and got my wife’s symptoms managed.
As always, thank you for sharing your time and creativity. I hope you have a fantastic year.
Thank you for all the work that you have put into your amazing writing. You are one of my absolute favorite authors out there.
Now that I have that out of the way, Thank you for sharing your struggles with the rest of us as well, it makes me feel like I can get there too. Haters are never fun, so keep deleting, no one need their negativity especially you. I love your goals for the year I hope you blow them out of the water easily.
And yes my link to this was broken as well but I ended up deleting it and emptying my trash right after, trying to get rid of all the post Christmas garbage that I get sent.
I just want to say thank you for your writing. Honestly, I pretty much cycle through your stories constantly. I’ve read the older ones so many times that they are my favorites for when I want to read because I can’t sleep; I don’t get sucked into the whole one more chapter thing, but still find little things that I didn’t notice the last ten times I read it. I can’t wait to see what you write this year.
I’ve also had a few rude comments about my own openness with my mental health. Almost 14 years ago I spent 10 days in the psych hospital after struggling almost a year with some physical health problems that I was eventually told that I was just going to have to learn to deal with. I was diagnosed with dysthymia and generalized anxiety disorder (which surprised me, I thought it was normal) on top of my adhd. It all eventually worked out fairly well, but I’ve always been open about the psych ward and even joke about my time there. When someone says that I shouldn’t be telling people about it, my response is that I don’t know what anyone else is going through and my story may help someone else make it.
Finally, I had an almost total hysterectomy almost two years ago after a bit of a cancer scare (they left one ovary). Thankfully I was told I had endometriosis, which still shocks me because I had no symptoms of it. So glad to be over the period part of everything. But I have gone from freezing all the time to hot flashes or flushing or something all the time. I swear the people I live with are trying to kill me this winter!
If my husband goes near the thermostat, I’ll wake up from a dead sleep to stare at him in fury. I keep my house 68F year round.
I’ve only just begun perimenopause, I think. No flashes but I’m getting the charmingly and appropriately named floods. 10 day periods, super heavy flow like 8 days in (used to be 5 total and rarely heavy or painful), frequent clots that hurt like hell to pass, and mid-cycle bleeding. Like, why wasn’t I warned? No one talks about this shizz. If it happened to men, there’d be armies of pharmaceuticals and a whole specialty instead of the general *shrug* we get from too-frequently misogynistic medicine.
I am unbelievably psyched for all your goals this year 🙂 Especially What Might Have Been! Cheering on from the UK!
I think it’s really cool that you are able to see your journey and growth as a writer over all these years. I can’t say I’ve ever had a hobby, talent, or passion that I’ve been able to give that kind of dedication to. You’re talent in writing and world building is incredible. I rapidly became addicted to all your works and reread them sometimes montly… .
I didn’t really know about EAD until last year. It was a glorious moment to find a treasure trove of your writing I hadn’t plundered yet. I think I have probably read Small Magic at least a half a dozen times in the last year. I adore it and am excited to see where you might take it with a rewrite. I really like the connection your have in several of your works between LOTR & HP. I enjoy all of your ships but Hermione is my preferred character I base my fanfic reads on. So I have to confess that while Arda Exodus is a awesome plot and I think it’s super cool all the characters and ritual stuff and honestly everything in the story… I was kind of disappointed that Harry & Hermione weren’t snuck in somehow as an exception to all other terrible magical people. Than I think it was in Warhide you referenced the year being at some point in the 70s, and I was like “Yay! At least their not alive!” ♀️I am completely ridiculous.
Anyways, I think you are incredible. Your bluntness and lack of fucks to give is the light of my life. 100% serious, it’s like a serious case of hero worship, lol. So anyways, I hope 2024 is a great year for you and you’re writing pleases you. May the idiots you encounter be few
So excited to see what you post this year! Small Magic was so much fun to begin with, so I am looking forward to the changes you make, especially since Arda Exodus is one of my favorites.
Fuck them and the horse they rode in on. If people talked more about their mental health I might have realized sooner that my ass was wandering around with undiagnosed clinical depression, an anxiety disorder and ADHD. I’ve got a tarp, and I know where a shovel is. If you need it for anything.
Thank you for you stories. You are a great writer and you bring joy into my life.